#fuck maybe even trip on shrooms

[snekdood]

so august 2018 is when my peak being-crazy-made art craziness happened, huh

[natsredbra]

A fractured line

summary: after your boyfriend breaks up with you, you find solace in your sworn enemy (and realize that obsessing over a girl for years isn't very straight of you)

a/n: listennn, I promise this is a Nat fic and I tried to keep the Travis part as short as possible, but there's tension between them from the beginning. it's also the first full length fic I've written in almost two years so be gentle guys!! constructive criticism is always appreciated! also if it does any good I already have an idea for pt 2 that involves sesbian lex and angst so let me know if you'd be interested in that!

warnings: break ups, shrooms, comphet reader, injuries, angst, no smut in this one, obviously swearing, bickering, reader has a redemption arc- mean girl!r in the beginning, mention of a fight- I think that's about it!

word count: 8.7k

part 2

You laid in Travis’ lap by the lake, feeling his slender fingers rake through your hair as you watched the illuminating sunset before you. Maybe, just maybe, if you were on a field trip with your friends from back home, sneaking in booze and huddling up to him on the drive home, you’d think this place was beautiful

“It’s getting colder” He said in a raspy voice above you

“Yeah, guess it is” You said, not taking your eyes off of the beautiful sky “No game huh?”

“Nope.” He said, feeling almost butthurt

“We’re so fucked” You said with a snort. You never had an issue with being mean blunt, even though it always sometimes sounded bitchy and outright rude. You were almost lost in your thoughts, but then felt him lean down awkwardly to press a kiss to your lips.

Truth be told, the only reason a girl like you started dating a guy like Travis was to get closer to his dad (and maybe become team captain). He didn’t question it much— dating someone as pretty and as popular as you was the usual Wiskayok boy’s wet dream. It worked well enough, coach did seem to favor you and you being the bitch you are, didn’t feel bad for Travis at all, but it had come right back to bite you in the ass— realizing you were falling for him was like a cruel punch to the gut. It was all you could think about, you never caught feelings for anyone before, not really, all you ever did was try to get something out of someone, but what does any of it matter out here? What do you matter, what is even the point of—

“You okay? You look like your head might explode” He said, you finally looked up at him

“Nothing, nothing I’m fine” You bluffed, looking back at the sky

“You can uh— you can talk to me y’know?” He said, something like that sounded a little wrong coming from him

“Mhm” You hummed, looking back at the sight before you

You heard a bit of ruffling signaling that someone was approaching you and you raised your head from Travis’ lap, sitting up next to him

“Ugh, it’s you” You groaned. Natalie Scatorccio. You didn’t like most of your teammates anyway, but she was something else completely. There was something about her that drove you crazy and you had no idea what it was.

“Nice to see you too Y/N” Natalie said with a scoff “Came to get you. We need your help with chores” She said after which you let out a dramatic groan, laying back down

“Sweep the fucking porch yourself” You called out, putting on Travis’ discarded flannel as it was getting chilly

“Oh you’re not sweeping the porch, princess” She said teasingly “You’re helping Shauna carve up the deer”

“I’m absolutely not doing that” You said, not bothering to get up, all while Travis watched the interaction with immense amusement

“What? It’s not organic or somethin’?” Natalie questioned, walking over to you, you stood up, tugging Travis who was now standing right behind you

“Yeah! I actually care what goes in my body!” You said with a snort, seeing her eyes darken just a little

“You’re such a bitch. Seriously, fuck you.” She said, trying to appear intimidating, though it wasn’t going too well. After a beat she walked off and you huffed out a laugh

“She’s not that bad, y’know?” Travis said and you turned around to face him. You hated your soft spot for him

“You wanna take her side now?” You said, deflecting. So typical.

“I didn’t say that, I’m just saying, you’re even meaner to her then the others. Plus, didn’t you say you wanted to try to be nicer and all that?” He said, at which you just chuckled, looking up at him

“This lighting is agreeing with you”

“Why thank you”

____________________________________________

Next morning, everyone gathered in front of the cabin, watching Taissa as she announced her plan to go searching for help. It was ridiculous, really. You all knew there effort would be fruitless, and that it was a huge risk.

“Like I said, we’re not on an island. If we go south we’ve gotta run into something eventually, a road, a town, anything!” She said, trying to reason with the girls. Safe to say, Van was very opposed

“Okay but you can’t just take our stuff” You said, leaning forward as Travis’ hand traced patterns on your lower back

“Yeah, I’m all for what you’re trying to do Tai, but the gun has to stay” Natalie said, you almost scowled at the thought of having the same idea as her.

“Then I’ll take some things that we don’t use every day. The compass, one of the axes—“ Taissa started again

“There’s a flair gun at the dead guy’s plane” Jackie chimed in

“Don’t tell me that you of all people are on board with this.” Van said in disbelief

The conversation flew by from then on, you completely zoned out.

Soon enough, you made your way to Travis’ room, seeing him packing a bag. What the hell does he think he’s doing?

“What are you doing?” You asked him as your eyebrows knitted together

“Oh uh— not to sound like a sexist asshole, but I think they could use a guy out there” He said as you sat on the bed

“You’re leaving?” You asked, sounding upset, the tone surprising both of you “I’m pretty sure they’ll be fine on their own”

You took the parfume he was going to pack, fiddling with the cap

“Yeah but still, the more people there are—“ He started, seeing the look in your eyes. You glared at him like he was saying the most ridiculus thing known to man

“I— Travis, don’t. Please, okay? Let them go through with their dumbass ideas, you don’t have to be part of it. Stay with me.” You said with an involuntary pleading gaze. It didn’t take him much convincing to stay- your puppy eyes and soft voice were things he rarely witnessed, and he took note of how genuine you really sounded.

“Yeah. Yeah, okay.” He said softly, you got up on your feet, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing your lips against his. His hands landed on your hips as he kissed you back just as eagerly. You smiled into it, breaking the kiss while his hands stayed where they were. You were still just a few inches away from him, giving him a small smile. These were the kind of moments you relished in. You brought the forementioned perfume to your nose, sniffing it and and grimacing

“God, this is gross” You said putting the cap back on and tossing the bottle onto the bed

“Yeah, my mom gave it to me before we left, thought it’d be a good disinfectant or something” He said, smiling involuntarily as the pads of his thumb rubbed your clothed hips

“I think you’d actually make it worse if you put this on someone”

You two heard commotion outside, signaling the girls were saying their goodbyes

“Got anyone to bid farewell?” He asked jokingly

“No.” You answered simly with a smirk, kissing him again as you both fell back on the bed

He started peppering kisses all over your face and neck while you laughed, holding onto his shoulders

“Travis!! There’s a number of girls in this fucking cabin, I would not hear the end of it” You said, still chuckling. The boy above you let out a dramatic groan into your neck but hovered back up to kiss you once more

“I’ll go see what’s going on” You said, getting up. You did turn around once more before you left, seeing him grin like an idiot. When you left, you seemed to walk into an intense conversation shared by none other then Jackie and Shauna. Come to think of it, Shauna had been weird since the whole ‘shark week’ thing. Seemed almost tense, though it was very subtle.

“Y/N, hey. Uh— a bunch of us are gonna go to the lake, you wanna come?” She asked, earning a sharp look from Jackie, simply for inviting you

“Yeah. Yeah, sure” Shauna was one of the girls you got along with fine, though the same couldn’t be said about her best friend. Jackie was someone you truly resented, it’s like everything you longed for, she got, everything. Of course you could never say that out loud. It’d make you seem awfully insecure- which you definitely were, but no one needed to know that. Shauna seemed to have picked up on the slight tension in the air, which became more unbearable as each moment passed

“Let’s just go, okay?” The brunette said, hurrying off to get dressed

As you got dressed and went down to the lake, you started a casual conversation with Lottie— people had noticed you became nicer out here. Maybe it was the impending doom, or maybe just the fact that you’d go nuts if you didn’t talk to anyone. They weren’t sure, didn’t care what it was and definitely didn’t voice it. Most of the girls were simply glad they got to see the unguarded version of a person that most of them knew since kindergarten. But God bless Lottie, she was eagerly talking about something, but you were too focused on someone else to even notice.

“Nat looks nice without all the makeup, right?” No no, there was no way you just said that out loud, or looked at her enough to notice, was there?

“I- yeah, guess so” Lottie, being nice as she is said

You mumbled a ‘yeah’ as Lottie carried on with whatever she was saying, not being able to help your eyes which wandered back to Natalie. Whenever she was around you she had her guard up, and this was the first time you’ve seen her laughing and having fun with friends. She always fascinated you in a way. Her careless attitude and aloof demeanor were something not many people had the courage to show. You wondered how, maybe even envied her for it a little. But not the way you envied Jackie. It is a hard feeling to explain.

“Wanna go into the water?” Lottie asked, snapping you away from your thoughts

“Huh? Oh- oh, sure” You said, getting up

She soon disappeared to go talk to Laura Lee, Lottie that is, while you teetered on the edge, the lake being cold and all.

“C’mon, don’t be a wuss!” Natalie yelled while you graced her with an eye roll as a reply

You made one more step and sighed��� which soon turned into gasp at the feeling of being splashed with the frigid water by none other then-

“Natalie what the fuck?!”

“Dude it’s for just shits and giggles!” She yelled out with an eye roll of her own “Just get in here!” She spoke again. She was being actually kinda nice, which made you think for a moment, but then you remembered what you’ve been trying to acomplish— be at least civil to people. Nat was definitely a good place to start, so you held back a snarky remark or an uncalled for insult and just jumped in. It wasn’t a welcome sensation, to say the least.

“Get on top of Nat, we’re playing chicken!” Shauna said, hung on Jackie’s shoulders. You did reluctently climb onto Natalie while Lottie and Laura Lee cheered. You pushed Shauna with all your might, laughing and raising your arms up once you defeated them. You could feel and hear Nat laughing under you as she tapped your thigh. The slight touch sent a shiver down your spine, but that’s obviously because her hands were cold.

“Good job!” She said, seeing Jackie and Shauna swim out

“Yeah yeah” You muttered, but before you could finish, she threw you off her and into the water. You let out yet another surprised gasp as your back scraped against the rocks underneath the water, though you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You were finally letting yourself be free for a little, and fuck did it feel good. The both of you laughed, holding each other underwater since she did fall on top of you.

“Wait wait wait—“ You started, fixing her eyebrows that were all mussed up, all while her eyes raked over your face, which you didn’t seem to notice.

“Uh- thanks.”

___________________________________________

The day went on, and after a couple of hours well spent lazing around and playing games, you lot did agree it was best to head back and start on “dinner”. You put one of Travis’ many flannels over your bikini (that was originally meant for the hotel pool) and grabbed your bag, walking back after.

“Hey! Wait up!” Natalie called out, rushing a little to catch up to you

“You talkin’ to me?” You questioned, turning around and slowing down a little

“Yeah, obviously…anyway you uh— you wanna go berry hunting before sundown? Could be fun” Nat asked with a tinge of hope and a small smile

“Yeah, no. Not my idea of fun.” You responded, turning back and walking now that she caught up and was by your side

“Well what about a card game or something before dinner? I just figure coach would—“

“What do you want, Natalie?” You asked, a bit annoyed, stopping in your tracks

“I was just—“ She started, but you cut her off

“We’re not friends…I mean— you know that, right? Jesus.” You stated bluntly

The blonde snorted before responding: “Yeah, we sure aren’t.” Nat said bitterly, walking off, or better yet, stomping

As soon as you all got back, you went to the room Travis slept in, seeing him reading a book. He looked kind of nice like this- without a care in the world, even though there was a lot to care for

“Hey, d’you have fun?” He asked, looking up and smiling softly. He probably didn’t even realize it.

“Yeah, I’m exhausted.” You said, dropping the bag on the floor and plopping down on the bed immidately

“No no no- don’t get the bed wet!” The boy exclaimed, which was valid, yet you did groan at having to get up again so you just dramatically rolled down, hitting the floor with a thud

“You are so extra.” Travis told you, chuckling, “And you need to stop stealing my clothes, I will run out of things to wear”

“You? I only packed clothes for a week! I’m actually going insane!! And I miss conditioner…and blowouts, and face masks. And cheeseburgers, I should’ve never held back” You stated groaning, the boy above you just chuckled at your little rant. He looked at you like you hung up the stars, which was cute in a way. However, you were so used to that look by now, you could barely register whether it was genuine. Still, you always felt like he didn't listen. Like- ever. Calling you random and extra were almost the only things in his vocabulary whenever you said more then two sentences.

“Travis! Y/N! Dinner is served!” Someone yelled— most likely Shauna, signaling you to finally make your way over and eat something.

____________________________________________

“There’re no queens in that deck, y’know?” Natalie said to Travis, walking into the cabin, though he didn’t respond

“Wanna try to hunt? I’m goin’.” She said— they were the designated hunters, but it was a bit of an unvocalized rule that one could take a day off if needed

“You go. You’re better at it anyway” He said, still fiddling with the deck

Nat snorted, packing her back before responding: “Your girlfriend is an asshole, y’know that?” The blonde asked rethorically, to which Travis just chuckled

“Am I interrupting something?” You asked, leaning against the doorframe and crossing your arms over your chest

“You’re good.” Travis called out

“And what are you doing this fine morning?” You asked Nat teasingly

“Hunting.” She stated bluntly, walking past you, which earned her a signature eye roll and scoff

“Well she’s got a twist in her panties…you know, I looked through that, there’s no queens” You said to Travis as your gaze softened, sitting next to him

“Oh I’ve heard” The boy responded, looking back at you before leaning in to give you a kiss “You slept through the entire morning, you feelin’ okay?”

“Oh no, yeah, I was just tired after all day yesterday…Any food left?” You questioned with a hint of hope

“Uhh, yeah. Jackie wanted to eat it but Natalie wouldn’t let her for shit.”

“…Oh” Well that did take you by surprise, I mean you tehnically weren’t rude to her but not exactly nice either

“Yeah, I’m gonna go to the lake, check out the fish traps” Travis said,

“Mmkay” You mumbled, giving him a peck on the cheek before he got up.

Now you were left all alone, a tad bit bored— you even considered doing chores, but after eating your hard earned food, definitely.

It felt like a fucking eternity, truly. You figured sweeping the floors couldn’t be all that bad, yet you were huffing and puffing as if you worked on a field all day. Although you could’ve been just biased— as a soccer player you were athletic anyway.

“Oh hey, you’re back!” You said excitedly, noticing your boyfriend had returned, letting the makeshift broom lean against the wall, “Wanna go for a walk? It’s pretty warm— is everything okay?“ You asked, noticing the look on his face that was much colder than the one he usually put on around you.

“Do you have just— like, no shame?” He questioned, leaving you wondering what the hell this was about

“Excuse me?” You asked with a small scoff, going up to the doorway

“Be fucking team captian? That is what you wanted?” He asked in disbelief, towering over you.

At this point, your throat felt dry and you weren’t sure what to do. Fess up? Bluff? Just say you don’t care and leave? But that’s the main issue of it all. You did care, for some reason. And you were afraid of losing him this way, especially out here.

“Look, I’m not gonna lie-“

“No?”

“No. Listen, maybe in the very beginning, yeah, I tried to get closer to your dad or whatever but the more time went on the more I started caring about you and-“ Your voice trembled. It was a weak response, a dumb excuse but it was the only one you could give

“Y/N I thought you wanted to- be together!” He stated, looking you right in the eye. It was always this way with him- beating around the bush before it becomes too much and one of you completely explodes. This time, it felt different, felt more serious.

You were on the spot, unsure of what to do or how to salvage the only relationship that actually meant something to you.

“I don’t know how to fix this. I’m not even sure you want me to.” A beat. “I just— I made a mistake”

“Yeah, well apparently so did I.” He said, throwing his arms up in disdain

“What the hell is that suppoused to mean?”

Your question was left unanswered as the boy simply walked away. You could hear the sound of his footsteps fading, your heart sinking a little more with each one. You hated it, all of it. The fact that this whole thing happened, this gnawing feeling, your eyes which were now watery, the shame and guilt or letting him find out in the first place. How the fuck did he find out?

“Y/N?” You heard a soft voice call out

You didn’t have to turn around as the mystery girl moved to stand next to you, placing a gentle hand on your back

“Nat? What is it?” The whole thing happened in maybe five seconds, but to you it felt like hours

“I heard the— are you okay?” She asked in the softest voice you’d ever heard from her. It took you by great surprise.

You looked at her even though your vision was mostly blurry, she stood close to you, trying to gauge how you’re feeling. There was absolutley no point in lying anymore so you just shook your head, which softened her gaze further.

“No no, it’s gonna be okay, let’s go for a walk, yeah?” She said and, you didn’t even fully register what she said. You also didn’t see her shooting Jackie a sharp glare- in fact, you didn’t notice Jackie at all.

Once you disappeared into the woods, the two of you settled down next to a small stream. It was quiet, and far away from everyone’s prying eyes. The blonde next to you pulled a flask out of her jacket pocket, handing it to you. You silently accepted, taking a generous gulp of…something. It was absolutley disgusting and made you grimace

“God, what is this?” You asked, passing it back to her, she chuckled before answering

“Vodka.” She said, taking a sip for herself

“Right…so how much did you hear?” You questioned, turning your head to look at her

“Not much. Just that last part.” She said, handing you the flask again “So what’d you do?”

You raised your eyebrows and sighed, taking one more swig before answering

“I uh- had a bad reason to get with him in the first place.” You said, practically scolding yourself

“Yeah, I figured it was something like that. But c’mon- it’s so obvious how much you care about him now” The blonde said, moving a little closer to you

“Not to him apparently.” Your voice trembled as your eyes watered again. God, this is not happening, you thought to yourself, not sure whether to be upset or embarrassed.

Here you were, sitting in bumfuck nowhere, feeling like the dirt on someone’s shoe and smuging your ridiculously expensive mascara over Travis Martinez. But there was Natalie too. She let you lean your head on her shoulder while rubbing soothing circles on your back. She made it all a little better. A little bareable.

“Do you think they’re okay?” You questioned after a series of sniffles and soft sobs, doing anything to get your mind off of this

“Hm?”

“Taissa…and the others.”

“Oh. I honestly don’t know.” She said, she knew she didn’t need to sugarcoat it around you. You shuffled just a little closer to her

“Thank you, for this, really.” She tilted her head down to look at you, and realized you were in fact, being genuine.

“Anytime.”

“I feel like- you’re the only person who’s not going insane out here. I mean Jackie and Shauna are being weird and Lottie’s fucking losing it—“ You started, realizing you were ranting

“Yeah, see how nice I really am? I’m sharing my very limited booze with you.” She said teasingly, to which you rolled your eyes, though this time it was playful

“Yeahhh! It’s radiating off of you.” You muttered, casually laying your head in her lap.

At this point, you were embarassed, upset, a little tipsy and definitely got a wave of post breakup clarity, so you weren’t exactly thinking about your course of action, though you did feel her stiffen up a bit. After a beat she eased into it, letting her hand travel lower to rub your back. It’s funny- this was a similar scene from a couple of days ago, though if anyone told you who it’d be with, you’d laugh right in their face. This time you couldn’t gaze at the sky, though you did gaze at its reflection in the small stream of water in front of you.

“How do you do it?” You asked in a low, raspy tone, not letting your eyes move away from the sight in front of you

“Do what?” Natalie responded, her movements stilling for a moment

“Not care. About anything. Or y’know, other people?”

The girl above you huffed in amusement, her gaze softening once you turned to lay on your back, looking up at her

“We all care, Y/N. Some of us are just good at hiding it. You are good at hiding it.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

You glanced into her eyes- a beautiful blue which almost matched the sky above you. At this moment it was all erased- the petty fights, disagreements, arguments, icing each other out during practice, almost beating the other up in the locker room after (it only happened once); all gone. There was just a girl above you, she looked like a different person and truly felt like it too. Maybe you were the one that changed. Maybe she was always this way, but you’d never given her a chance. However you swore that if you looked at her from a different angle, you wouldn’t recognize her.

“So are we okay now?” She asked, moving some hair away from your face. Her voice had an uncertainty to it, it wasn’t the first time you went hot and cold on her out here

“Yeah, we’re okay. Friends even?”

“That sounds good.”

“Let’s go back, yeah? It’s gonna get dark soon.”

Nothing could’ve prepared you for what you saw when you got back. You sure did get a few curious and skeptical glances simply for being together, but nobody said anything; They were preoccupied with Misty, Akhila, and Mari who were explaining just what happened to Van. It was gruesome, and it left you wondering how the hell she was still alive. Natalie and you rushed over, gathering any nesseceties to start tearing off into the woods and looking for them, even though you dreaded the impending search.

It was getting significantly darker and the group was losing any hope of finding Taissa and Van anytime soon, or at all. Maybe no one wanted to admit it, but everyone was out of their minds with panic and worry.

“Are you sure this is the way you went?!” Shauna asked Misty

“I- I don’t know, it’s dark, I can’t see anything!” The girl responded, she was cut off by flames that shone distinctly behind the trees.

“It’s them!”

The entire group ran towards their missing friends, catching the two girls collapsed on the ground. It was even worse than you thought- Van was unrecognizable and Tai looked plain exhausted and spent.

You never did well with blood and gore— or anything similar to it, Nat seemed to have caught on it, squeezing your hand reassuringly. Only then you realized she was actually holding it.

She never for a second let go of you, until you made it back to the cabin. You lot arranged a makeshift surgery table for Akhila to stitch Van up. It was a truly nauseating sight, a few girls, including Natalie were holding her down while Lottie, Jackie and you stood back, watching in horror and disbelief. Just as she was halfway through with it, you couldn’t handle it anymore.

You quickly ran outside attempting to get fresh air and take deep breaths, though it was in vain as you were hunched over and holding onto the pillar with one hand, emptying out the contents of your stomach moments after. It’s not like there was much anyway.

As you were finishing up, you heard someone storm out and make their way to you. Until you could make out who it was, they already walked up to you.

“Are you alright?” Travis questioned, placing a hand on your back

You thought for a moment, narrowing your eyes. Like what the fuck were you suppoused to say? How did he even have the balls for this? Anyhow, you didn’t have a chance to respond as today’s knight in shining armor ran out as well.

“Let’s go to sleep, yeah? You need it, after today.” Natalie stated, already pulling you along with her, you just nodded, eternally grateful for her spectacular timing

The blonde entered the cabin with you, dragging your sleeping bag over next to hers. As soon as she did you laid down, and she followed by with you. The couple of you stayed like that for a moment before she spoke up.

“I’m glad we kinda cleared the air up. I mean if you think about it, we’re kinda two sides of the same coin, right?” She whispered with a breathy chuckle

“Yeah, me too. You know, I never really apologized for—“ You started, trying to find the words

“Being an asshole? A complete douchebag?”

“Yeah, that.” You said simply, a small involuntary smile graced your face

“It’s okay. I’ve seen you out here y’know? Like— how you’ve tried to be more calm and shit…Not that I’ve been watching you or anything just—“ Nat’s little praise rant was cut off by an annoyed Mari

“Jeeeeesus, you’ve been fighting for years and wanna have your little heartfelt conversation now? Just let us sleep.”

To that, Nat and you let out another couple of those breathy chuckles before she whispered once more

“Night, Y/N/N”

“Night.” You whispered back, turning your back to her. You could feel her soft breathing even out against your neck as you drifted off, feeling a sense of safety. Something you hadn’t felt in a long time, even before you crashed.

It felt like less then minutes of sleep as you got rudely awaken by none other then Laura Lee, banging…something. You couldn’t make it out, not this sleepy. You groaned, raising your head in sync with Natalie, whose arm was clung lazily across your midsection. The two of you were so close that once you sat up, you could feel her slightly ragged breathing on your cheekbone.

“You’re gonna fly?” The sentance by Lottie took you out. Until just now, you were too drowsy (or maybe just distracted by Nat and your’s proximity) to pay attention to what the blonde in front of you was saying— she wants to fly the abandoned plane?

“But you don’t know how.” Nat said, sitting up straighter

“I’ve read the flight manuel, and I checked the gas tank, it’s full!”

“You cannot be serious.” You stated in disbelief

“Look, I used to watch my grandpa fly, he even let me stir a few times, I know that I can do this! And you can’t deny that Van need serious medical attention.” Laura Lee said. You felt gnawing deja vu, remembering everything that happened just the other day when someone was convinced they could find a way to get the fuck out of here.

“She’s not the only one.” Jackie said. A beat. “Shauna, tell them.”

You furrowed your brows in confusion, shooting a look to Natalie, which she returned. After a few seconds of slience, Shauna spoke.

“I’m pregnant.” The statement took everyone by surprise, it was followed up by a few gasps and a very curious Misty Quigley. There were also a few questions, though the only one that truly reached you was-

“Did it happen out here?!” By Mari. The thought and implication of the question itself made your stomach drop a little, though you were very relieved when Shauna replied with a firm no.

“It doesn’t matter when it happened, okay? It just matters that we get them both help.” Jackie said, looking around the room to get her point across

“Wait— if it didn’t happen here, who is the baby daddy?” You chimed in, only half joking, to which Nat chuckled beside you

“It doesn’t matter.” Jackie shot back

“Okay- no, Laura Lee, I’m not letting you do this. It’s not even close to safe.” Coach said, seemingly appearing out of nowhere, at least to you

“There’s no safe anymore Coach Scott. Winter is coming, If I don’t do this then- we’re all gonna fucking starve.” The girl shot back at him. Her swearing did take you by surprise. And it’s not like Ben could do anything to stop her anyway. You couldn’t help but feel a flicker of hope at the whole ordeal.

Not more than fifteen minutes later, all of you gathered to help clean up the plane, and take it out of the shackles that the woods themselves created. At this moment, you found yourself talking to Nat yet again.

“Okay okay, what is the first thing you’re gonna do when we get back?” You questioned, tearing the vines around the left wing

“First thing? Oh I was gonna say take a shower but realistically it’ll be lighting up a blunt” She responded with a chuckle “What about you, princess?”

You truly tried to ignore the little overlap your heart made at the nickname she always teased you with, you did.

“Uhh…well mine will be taking a looooong bath. And doing an everything shower after” You answered

“The fuck is an ‘everything shower’?”

“It’s literally everything you can think of doing to butter yourself up. Like- hair wash, exfoliating, shaving and then after a blowout, maybe a face mask or something” You explained, feeling almost too upset by not being able to do any of those things. But you had bigger things to worry about. Like y’know- staying alive and stuff

“Your dreams are much more expensive then mine.” She replied to which you chuckled.

And you didn’t notice. You didn’t notice her eyes lingering on your features because your own lingered on something else. Someone else.

Rather yet, your longing gaze lingered on Travis, who was apparently having a very entertaining conversation with none other than Jackie fucking Taylor. She had to take that from you too?

See that’s the thing about addiction- you never really notice or think about anything else. You didn’t even notice when the girls first called out that Laura Lee was ready to go, you just kind of walked along.

Everyone was hugging her and saying their goodbyes. She embraced every single person without a second thought except you. You saw the glimmer of hesitation in her eyes when she approached you. Could you have been that fucking bad?

You went in and wrapped your arms around her anyway. It wasn’t the time to be petty.

Coach made one last attempt to try and talk the girl out of her risky plan, but she didn't budge. The blonde took off, she was really fucking doing it. She was flying.

Every single one of you were ecstatic, cheering and running towards the edge of the lake. This had given you all more hope then anything else in the past couple of months. You could be back home so soon. A thought that crossed your mind was having a spa day with Nat, you're sure she'd never been pampered that way before. You thought about exploring this new friendship out in the real world, which sent a thrill through you. You reached for her hand since she was right beside you, and she happily held it. Everything in this moment was perfect.

"Is that smoke?" Jackie asked, your brows knitted together as you tried to look for the source of her concern.

You didn't have to look for long. Mere seconds after, the plane exploded with a big flash. The shriek you let out was practically inaudiable compared to the loud 'bang' the explosion caused. You were startled, falling flat on your ass on the cold sand beneath you, the force with which you fell pulled Nat down with you too.

She snuck a hand around your waist, gripping you tightly as you both let out soft sobs of disdain and shock. The sight of Lottie, crumbling down because of the sudden loss was too much to bare. You couldn't even begin to imagine how it must feel, losing a person so dear to you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the crisp morning the sunlight beamed through the cabin, waking you from your restless sleep. It had been weeks after the incident, but the weight of it was still very present. A few girls that were up greeted you, and you grumbled a quiet 'morning' to them. It wasn't good- you simply acknowledged that it was morning.

Your eyes fell to Natalie's sleeping form beside you. She looked oh so peaceful, one of her hands rested on your hip and the other was above her head. Her lips were slightly parted and they formed a small pout. All the muscles in her face were relaxed and her chest rhythmically rose and fell. She was beautiful. You snuggled up to her, hoping to get a bit more rest before the day. You felt her stir a little, seeking your warmth even in her sleep. After a few minutes you noticed her breathing differ, as well as her lips curving into a small smile against your shoulder. The two of you had grown impeccably close since your break up with Travis, the day she comforted you like no one else ever had, or would.

"Hey."

"Hey Nat." You said, turning to face her

"Sleep well?" She asked, removing the hand from your hip and placing it under her head

"Nope." You responded simply, popping the p

"Yeah I figured...I'm starving" She muttered, burying her head further into your shoulder

You let out a bitter chuckle before responding, "Welcome to the fuckin' club"

The two of you laid there for a bit, relishing in the calm atmosphere- knowing it wasn't gonna last much longer.

A few hours had passed by, and the entire group was now awake and huddled by the fireplace while Mari worked on making breakfast, the meal being none other then a bunch of worms Shauna and Akhila brought back. You sat at Nat's feet, hugging your knees close to your chest with one arm as the girl finally handed you your food. Your face contorted in a slight, involuntary scowel at the sight

"Just pretend it's fries or something, yeah?" Natalie spoke above you, to which you silently nodded

"God, I can't to this" Mari said, disappearing for a moment. Once she returned, she had a jar of some kind of liquid with her

"What is that?" "Was some berries I was trying to save, but i think it might've turned into booze? I don't know about the rest of you, but I could use a drink."

"Do we think it's safe?" Tai asked with a hint of reluctence

"Do we care?" Good point.

"I don't!" You called out, extending your arm

"I have a few more." "If we have booze let's have a party." Jackie said in a flat tone- one that wasn't characteristic for her in the slightest

"Yeah, cause we have sooo much to celebrate" Taissa responded sarcastically

"Do we need a reason? We're gonna be dead in a few weeks." Jackie said, which yeah- true, but it was weirdly unsettling hearing it from her. She was the team's spirit, always hopeful and ready to offer reassurence and a smile. Even if you weren't fond of the girl, you wondered what could've changed her perspective so suddenly.

"...We packed dresses for the awards dinner. And it's gonna be homecoming soon"

"There's gonna be a full moon tomorrow" "Well there we go! We have dresses, we have booze, we can decorate...have sort of a moon homecoming." Jackie said, trying to convince the group

"More like a doom homecoming" Taissa said jokingly- though Van didn't seem to find it funny as she practically ran off

"A doomcoming" Lottie said, seemingly a bit out of it, but you did snicker at the idea. And so did Nat.

"Now that's a party idea" She said, looking over at Lottie

You leaned back, resting your head on Nat's knee

"Yeah, alright, a doomcoming- we'll drink rotten berries and celebrate our impending death.”

After that, you found yourself by Natalie's side, looking for branches, twigs, leaves, and little flowers, or anything that could help with decoration, really (which meant she was looking and you were walking along with her).

"So how've you been?" She asked, tearing something off a tree

"You know, you ask me that every day and the answer never changes" You replied, looking down at your grown out and chipped manicure

"Maybe I hope it will." She said sarcastically with her signature grin, turning to face you. Her expression suddenly became a bit more serious "He asks about you all the time, y'know?" She said reluctently, as if she was debating wether to voice it or not

And oh, yeah, him. That. You didn’t really care anymore, as bad as that sounds. Sure, it was tough at times, with him being around all the fucking time, but it had been a month or so, and to say Nat made it all easier is a rude understatement.

"You two really got nothin' better to talk about then me, huh?" You said sarcastically, picking a little white flower from the ground. She chuckled a little before speaking again

"I just thought you might wanna know he does miss you." She said, there was a bitter edge to her tone

“Maybe. But there’s no point in digging through the mud. All you get is dirty.” As you said this, you noticed the look on her face- none other than relief. You just wondered why she’d be relieved you don’t want anything to do with Travis anymore. But of course, you didn’t think too much of it.

"Do you wanna- go together?" Nat asked, fiddling with the makeshift decorations in her hand

"Like to the dance? Sure, I guess. I never went with a friend before." Ohh, you sweet summer child.

"First time for everything I guess" She said, walking again

You followed up behind her, ranting mindlessly about random stuff and the things you missed most about being home. She pretty much just listened, chiming in from time to time. That's what you loved about her, she always let you talk about anything yet never seemed to grow bored. Not only that, but in future conversations she even brought up little details you'd told her. She was listening. Soon enough you got back to the cabin, saying a quick bye to her before going inside.

"You done with that?" You asked Jackie, pointing to her pink caboodle

"Uh yeah, you can have it!" She said with a small smile

You muttered a quick 'thanks' , picking it up and applying a bit of make up, even though you kinda hated having to do your eyeshadow with your hands.

"Looks pretty." The girl said simply

"Thank you." You responded, not taking your eyes off the mirror. This is what you hated most about her- how fucking nice she was. If she was at least a bitch, you wouldn't feel bad about being a jealous idiot. Little did you know why she was being even nicer all of a sudden. But just like everything else, you brushed it off. Didn't think about it at all. Not when someone else was on your mind- there was no room for her.

What you couldn’t stop thinking about was Natalie. She looked, like, pretty today. Like, really pretty. You could only imagine how she’d look tonight. And yeah- you thought about her a lot. Almost whenever she was away, you thought about her. You didn’t know- but she was the same way. Sue you guys! You finally got a good friend that you can rely on and hug and smoke weed with and kiss! Woah- anyway. Yeah, that thought was a momentary lapse. Back to makeup.

Once you were done with all that, it was time to put on your dress. Which you couldn’t fucking zip yourself, ugh.

“Someone? Help please!” You shouted out, being met with hurried footsteps soon enough

“What? What? Oh, right, dress” Nat said storming in- maybe she thought a snake attacked you or something

You just snickered as she walked up to you, standing behind you to help you with the zipper. It felt oddly intense, really. First, she let her hand drop from your shoulder to you hip, then finally dragged the damn piece of metal up your back. If you didn’t know her, you’d think she was trying to act out a scene from a soap opera. But really, she was always this way with you- which is normal! Girls help each other out, is what you learned out here, Natalie just does it better then most. You finally turned around to look at her, raising your eyebrows and giving her an amused grin

"Well you sure clean up well" You said, leaning against the wall and crossing your arms over your chest. And you weren't lying. She looked fucking hot in a leopard print dress.

"Right back atcha...you done with your hair?"

"Uhh yeah, why?" You asked, furrowing your brows before she held a finger up and excused herself, leaving you wondering what the hell she was doing.

It didn't last long though, as she emerged back through the door in under a minute, holding two dainty makeshift tiaras that seemed to be made out of a few twigs in her hands

"I know it's kinda cheesy but- I figured you didn't make anything and all of the girls will probably put something in their hair, so I thought I could make us like- matching ones. You don't have to wear it!" She said, pretty much rambling. All you could think about is how thoughtful this was. And as she said, yeah, it was cheesy, but who cares! This might be your last party ever, might as well go all out.

"No no, Nat, I really love it. Thank you." You told her, glancing at the mirror as you put it on.

"Pretty." She said simply, and you tried to pretend it had the same effect on you as when Jackie said it earlier, or anyone really. Even Travis, though he never said it a lot.

"We should go...make our fuckin' amazing grand entrance and all that." She said, shuffling from one foot to another

"Yeah, let's go"

"Let the doomcoming begin!" Lottie called out as you all entered. It was a good thing, all this. Made you almost feel normal. Y'know- a teen girl, going to a high school dance, longing for a girl, boy.

First that went in were Jackie and Shauna, no surprise there, soon followed Mari and Akhila then Ben and Misty. After them, you and Nat came in while she held onto your arm. The two of you settled into a corner as she handed you a glass of the rotten berries.

Almost immediately after that, a small smile graced her face and she tugged on your arm, pointing back to the entrance. Pointing at Tai and Van. It was such an endearing sight, really.

"Are they-"

"Duh."

*kiss*

*cheering*

"Nat and Y/N too though, right?"

"Oh definitely!"

"Tonight's special, here" Natalie said in her usual sarcastic tone, giving you some of the broth Mari had made for tonight. I mean you were starving anyway, so you downed it almost immediately as the two of you engaged in conversation with some of the girls.

Bit of time had passed, and now that (almost) everyone was well fed, you moved onto the drinking. The berries were fucking terrible, but at least it was something.

"Stop." Lottie started as everyone turned to look at her, "We should have a moment of silence for Laura Lee."

"Yeah."

"To Laura Lee." "To Laura Lee."

Afterwards, the first to speak was Nat, "So, what now?" She asked beside you in anticipation

"Oh, now we just need the DJ to pump up the volume."

"What we need is a slow dance!"

Everyone looked around in anticipation before Lottie started humming 'Kiss by a Rose', to which everyone followed suit until someone played it on their walkman.

Natalie and you awkwardly turned to each other before chuckling. She took the liberty of wrapping her arms around your neck, whereas your hands landed on her hips.

Normally, you would've been seething at the sight of Jackie and your ex right in front of you, but you were too distracted by Natalie's slender frame dancing along with you. Not only did she block the view, but everything else around you. You still did feel a bit uneasy, and you fucking hated it.

"You wanna get out of here? I have real booze." Nat asked, of course she noticed. Fully noticed your discomfort with the situation.

"Please."

The two of you sat on the cold ground, taking a quiet breather, God knows you needed it. Both of you had been so stressed and tired, just like everyone else. Still, being with each other brought you a strange sense of comfort. It was weird- you'd only been friends for about a month, maybe even less, but it didn't make your connection any less strong

"Do you think Travis and Jackie will hook up tonight?" You asked suddenly- you felt strangely lightheaded. Could've been the booze.

"I uh... I mean I dunno." Oh how obvious it was she was trying to make you feel better.

"They probably will, right? He's so stupid." You muttered, bringing your knees close to your chest and resting your head on them.

"Hey, look, who cares, right? He's just a dumb boy, and he has no idea what he's missing." She reassured

"I mean like, yeah, he's a dipshit, but still. I don't even think it's about him, I don't know how to explain it..."

"Well you felt safe with him. Maybe you weren't in love with the person but just, y'know, being loved, liked, whatever. You got off on it." She said, still not drinking. That you noticed, and you were a little proud- she didn't ask for the bottle, not once. "And I don't mean like your puppets and arm pieces back home, more as truly appreciated."

"Damn Nat"

"See? I'm a total philosopher!" She responded with a small grin, one you learned to love

"Yup. Sure are. Oh also!" You started, laying down which she did too, "I don't think I ever like, formally apologized for always being a hugeee cunt. So- I'm very sorry."

"Well you're very forgiven. See how a near death experience softened you? Plus you apologized about fifty times." Nat said teasingly, turning her head to look at you

The two of you were just frozen in the moment, staring at each other whilst you laid so close your arms were touching

"Nat I feel reallyyy weird"

She giggled softly before answering, "You're high, so-"

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah uh, you remember that time Misty poisoned coach?" "Mm."

"I think she put whatever that was in the food. Shrooms probably." Nat clarified, her eyes still boring into yours

"Seriously? Is it dangerous or something?" You questioned

"I mean, I don't think you can die from them." She said matter-of-factly

"Good enough for me. Dude this is an amazing buzz" You groaned out, tearing your eyes from hers and throwing your head back

She chuckled softly in response, still looking at you. And she wasn't ogling you or anything, she was fucking admiring you.

"You're stunning." She stated simply, her voice raspy and raw.

"Nat-" You started, but there was no way you could get any words out.

It could've been the shrooms, could've been the literal impending doom of knowing you were a dead girl still somehow walking. Maybe it was the loneliness of having your, admittedly toxic, safety net ripped away from you, or maybe the fact that you became a whole new person in the course of the last few months. You didn't know what it was, but you knew there was some kind of force pulling you towards this girl in a way that was more then friendly. Realizing that in the moment was like a soft caress, like one you'd never felt before. Accepting this was accepting a part of yourself you always knew was there, but it was buried deep down within you. But right now, you didn't care, for whatever reason mentioned. You just saw. You saw a beautiful, sensational girl before you.

Then you felt. You felt your heart do a somersault in your chest the moment you leaned in and brushed your lips against hers.

[returnofeternity]

synopsis. you go too far in the caves.

pairing: lottie matthews x gn!reader

genre: angst and fluff.

warnings. drug use, suffocation, passing out, character death for like a second?

wc: 2,246

· · 𐂂 · ·

you should have just stayed in bed and waited for her to come back. you knew where she was and what she was doing, and you knew she needed to be alone, but you couldn't sleep so you went looking for her.

she was doing exactly what you thought she was doing, aka praying to the Wilderness, but she was crying. and you hate it when she cries. and you hate how miserable she looked when she told you she couldn't hear It and that It didn't listen. you wanted to make her happy. so, you blurted out the only thing that's been cheering her up for the past few weeks.

"take me to the caves. i want to see more."

to be quite frank, you really dislike all these cave sessions lottie's been making you do. tripping out in the wilderness with shrooms was fine, cool even, but you can't count how many times you've almost died in the caves. the worst part is that it's all for naught. your 'visions' make no sense to you. most of the time they're just hallucinations of you and lottie back at home with some weird shit sprinkled in instead of visions of what the Wilderness desires. that's what these trips have been for; to hear and feel the Wilderness. and you do! you're connecting with it just like lottie wants, but you're not seeing It. you feel like you're failing lottie.

and you'd do anything to make her happy.

so going back to the caves with the gas leak it is.

lottie tightens the rope around your waist, looking up at you for confirmation that it's tight enough. you nod in return and she gives you a delicate smile, dropping her end of the rope so she can pick up the candle. the flame lights her face perfectly, and you get lost in her big, brown eyes as she moves a piece of her hair from out of her face.

"you should go deeper." she says, her voice gentle and calm. "maybe you'll be able to see more."

you don't like this idea.

"okay," you agree, your fingers nervously fiddling with the rope tied around your waist. "but is the rope even long enough?"

she looks down to eye the length and nods when she looks back at you. "it should be. just go as far as you can, okay? i got you." she reassures you, leaning in for a short kiss that makes all your worries melt away.

lottie pulls her mask up to cover her nose and mouth and bends down to pick up the rope before walking back to kneel by the entrance, rope tight in her hand. you let out a shaky breath and turn your back to her, wondering what the fuck you keep getting yourself into.

as you start walking into the cave, you hear lottie call out from behind, her voice echoing loudly off the walls. "listen to what's happening around you."

you mumble back an "okay" like she can hear you and steady yourself against the wall as you close your eyes and take a deep breath, trying to tune into the Wilderness. your shoes scuff against some rocks as you feel your way around and you gasp as a flash of you on a cliff pops into your mind. when you blink your eyes open, you're still in the cave, but it's cold as if the wind is nipping against your nose and cheek. despite the bad feeling you have in your stomach, you venture further into the dark cave. your eyes feel heavy and you keep bumping your shoulder against the wall of the cave because of how disoriented you feel. maybe you should sit down for a second.

you slide down the wall, groaning at the rocks scratching your back, and lift your shirt up to your nose so you can try and breathe properly. your throat burns as you take raggedy breaths and your eyes prickle with tears. this was a horrible idea. maybe you should just head back and make something up to make lottie happy. but if she found out you lied she'd be angry at you. goddammit.

the rope around your waist pulls you forward slightly and you catch yourself with your hands, face grimacing as you breathe in the not-so-fresh air of the cave. weakly, you pat the ground for the rope trailing behind you and tug at once to let lottie know you're okay. you make a retching sound as you move to get up, frothy drool leaking from your lips and onto the cave ground. well, shit, that's never happened before. you'd better hurry and get the fuck out of out here. you can come another time. lottie would understand.

when you get up, reality flashes between that cliff you saw and the cave. it makes you pause, and when you step forward and blink, you're on the cliff. right on the edge. you try to move back but your feet are glued to the ground. the wind blows harshly and makes your eyes well up with tears, and it's only then you realize that you can only move your eyes. everything else is stiff. you try to shout for lottie, but your mouth won't open, and even the choked sob that racks your body doesn't let out. it sounds more like a muffled scream.

the wind blows again but this time it's with more force and it makes you sway back and forth. the feeling makes your stomach sink, and a cold sweat washes over your body. your wide eyes fly to the bottom of the cliff, the clouds and rocks below making it seem like it's millions of miles deep. you start praying for something to wake you up from this hallucination; lottie, the Wilderness, god, who-the-fuck-ever can help you.  

suddenly, just as your body leans forward, about to fall off the cliff, you're back in the caves. you fall down, head bumping against the rocky floor and getting scratched up. your throat tightens and you wheeze, hands reaching up to grab at whatever force is choking you. the feeling is terrible. no matter how hard you try and breathe, you just can't. as the edges of your vision begin to fade to black, you let out a feeble whisper of lottie's name.

· · 𐂂 · ·

lottie tugs at the rope again, heart pounding in her chest when she feels how loose it is. she takes her mask off for a second to call out your name, listening intently for any response back. she hears nothing, and when she pulls the rope down in frustration, it snaps back so easily.

you're not attached to it anymore.

she puts her mask back on so fast that she accidentally scratches her nose. she holds her breath as best as she can as she jogs into the cave, frantically calling out your name and cursing under her breath. lottie tries to tap into the Wilderness, trying to feel where you could be, but she can't seem to sense you anymore. it's like a fading pulse in her head as she takes deep breaths and searches for you.

her eyes tear up and she sniffs, looking around to see if she can spot your body somewhere. there, in the corner, she can see your limp hand. immediately she rushes toward you, dropping to her knees and scooping your weak body into her lap.

"i got you. you're okay, you're okay." she mutters to herself rather than you.

lottie tugs you up and carries you back to the entrance of the cave, her muscles burning as she tries to keep upright and keep you in her arms despite the lack of fresh air in her lungs. she collapses near the opening and apologizes to your unconscious body for accidentally hurting you. her hands cradle your face and she shakes you, body prickling with fear when she notices just how limp you are.

she puts her hands over your heart and starts to pray. "bring them back to us. bring them back to us." your pulse slowly weakens more as she repeats those words over and over, and she gets desperate. she looks around the cave before her eyes land on the flickering candle. "fuck it."

she grasps onto the can that's a candle and slices her hand on the sharp edge, instantly dripping her blood onto your body and moving into a prayer position with her bloody hand over your heart.

"bring them back to me. bring them back to me. bring them back. please. please."

you come back into consciousness screaming for lottie and clawing at your throat. you can finally breathe but barely. lottie's there to shush you and stroke your head, grabbing you by your shirt to tug you into her arms.

"'it's okay, it's okay, you're safe. i got you." she whispers to you, soothingly rubbing your back and helping you get your breathing back to normal. she pushes you back gently and strokes your cheek, her thumb wiping your freshly falling tears.

"i'm sorry, i tried to go as far as i could." your voice is hoarse as you speak and it hurts. you cling onto her warm arms and rub her skin with your thumbs to try and calm yourself down but you can't keep your sobs in. she pulls you back in for a hug and shakes her head. you stay there for a few moments, thinking about whether you should tell her what you saw or stay silent. "i wanna go back now, please."

maybe you'll tell her later.

· · 𐂂 · ·

lottie holds your hand all the way back to the huts, even when you told her you needed to take a piss. it's endearing but still uncomfortable. didn't help the fact that she didn't take her eyes off you either.

the walk back is silent, and you know she feels guilty because she's not saying anything. you want her to say something, but your throat hurts too much to speak, so you just rub her thumb and pull her closer to your side.

when you get back to the shelter, she sits you down on the bed and tells you to stay put while she runs and gets a rag and bowl of water. you don't know why she's cleaning you up when she's the one who's bleeding more than you, but it feels nice to be taken care of by her. honestly, you almost forget about the scratches on your head until you hiss at the slight pain as she cleans them up. lottie leaves again to get her herb paste made from heliotropes and other various plants to put on your wounds, cooing at you quietly when you whine from how much it stings.

"let me put it on your hand?" you suggest after she sets the paste down on the bed and kisses your nose. "it looks bad."

she nods and gives you her hand, and you clean it with some water first before applying the purple-ish paste. lottie bites her lip as you gently rub it across the nasty gash on her palm, and you apologize softly as you finish with it. you bring her hand to your lips so you can kiss it and help her onto your lap and into bed with you, cuddling her side protectively.

"we should take a few days off so you can rest before we go back." lottie mumbles, her fingers dancing along the side of your arm.

you sigh and shut your eyes, stomach swarming with uneasy feelings. "lott, i don't think i want to do this anymore. i mean, fuck, i almost died in there."

she sits up on her arm and leans over you, pieces of her hair tickling your face. "i know, but we need to figure out what the Wilderness wants. you're the closest to It now. It'll tell you what It needs, you just need to learn how to understand It. i can teach you."

you shake your head and gulp down some tears, turning your head away from her and inhaling heavily. "i was on some cliff before i passed out. i couldn't move at all. the vision stopped right as i fell from it, and then that's when i started choking. i don't know what it means. i don't know what any of my visions mean."

lottie frowns and leans over you some more so she can try and catch your gaze, and when you look back at her, her eyes are just as sad as you are. she bends down and captures your lips in a reassuring kiss, resting her head on your forehead as she whispers: "it's okay. we'll figure it out together. you just have to keep trying. we'll be safer next time."

your shoulders slump back against the blankets in defeat. you know she's just being pushy because wants the best for the group, but sometimes you wish she'd listen. you give a half-assed smile and nod, your fingers prodding at the holes in her mesh shirt as you try not to think about how nervous you are to go back.

"can you make me that herb tea? the one that always helps me sleep..." you mumble, feeling like you just need to rest for weeks to forget about today.

[bloodhivelottie]

your stomach twists as you lead lottie into the woods, your hands intertwined tightly as you walk. it's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay, you reassure yourself, but you still feel your whole body shake as you get closer to the clearing. the clearing where you intend to kill lottie.

“why are we here?” lottie asks, lagging behind you to run her fingertips over a nearby tree. her eyes close slowly as her fingers splay gently against the bark. trying to listen for the wilderness, you presume. your eyes coast over to the foliage -- the sticks and leaves you meticulously placed earlier to hide the pit. you let out a heavy, shaky breath before swallowing with nerves.

“i need you to listen to me,” you say, whirling around to face her. “this… stuff, with the wilderness, it's… it's not real, lot. it's bullshit. and i think deep down, you know it is too. i know you think you can hear it… or you used to. lottie, i…"

you pause, glancing away quickly. you still feel guilty.

“i think you might be sick. i think… these things you see, and hear… i-i don't know, but i think it's all in your head.”

lottie turns to face you, her expression unreadable.

“but you heard it. you felt it, too.”

you sigh again, your eyes screwing shut with a shake of your head.

“i heard something. because you had me trip on shrooms. it isn't a vision, or a sign, i'm not a fucking prophet, lottie, it was just drugs fucking with my head! don't you understand?”

you stop, panting, your whole body shaking as you lower your gaze. you can't even look at her.

“i can't let you do this anymore. it isn't right.” lottie steps closer, her hands reaching out to grasp your wrists gently. her fingertips move over your hand until she's weaving her fingers between yours.

“i'm sorry,” she says softly, and you feel your heart clench. “i just wanted you to feel it, too.”

you shake your head, your eyes blurring with tears. you wrench your hands away from hers to hastily scrub the tears from your face with your sleeve. why can't she just be angry? you need her to be.

“get away from me,” you murmur, and you wish you didn't glance up when you did because you can see the hurt flash across her face. “you're insane.”

you feel the guilt rise in your chest, but this is how it has to be. you have to push her away. it's the only way to truly be free.

“you wanna stay in the wilderness? go ahead. why don't you just go on and walk off into the trees. it's where you belong, right?” your voice wavers as you speak and you shove your hands in your pockets to hide how much you're shaking. 

lottie stays silent. she looks at you, her expression flashing with vulnerability and hesitance. but just as soon as you see it, it's gone. she holds her head up and turns away, walking slowly and carefully. purposefully.

your heart pounds in your chest and you almost reach out to grab her, to take it all back. to stop her. but you can't. the toe of lottie's shoe presses into the layer of sticks and leaves you wove together and you screw your eyes shut, bracing yourself for the sound of sticks snapping. the sound of lottie succumbing to the very wilderness she worships. 

but it doesn't come. you open your eyes, breath hitching in your throat when you see her standing in the middle of your trap.

how?

your head jerks in a shake of disbelief, your eyes wide and filled with tears. what are you even seeing? is this real? there's no possible way it could hold lottie's weight. maybe you're seeing things. maybe lottie's body really is at the bottom of that pit, speared and bleeding like a doe hunted down. maybe it's just your brain tricking you to protect itself. 

you close your eyes again, holding back a sob as you clutch your head, gripping your hair like it'll somehow bring you back to earth. but when you open your eyes again, lottie's still there. her silhouette tall and dark against the bright sunlight in the clearing. she slowly turns around, the corners of her lips twitching up almost in a smirk. a shudder wracks through your body. she knows? she can't.

lottie says nothing. she walks back the way she came, holding your gaze until she's walking past you. and then she's gone. 

you stand there, shaking harder than you did in the coldest nights of winter, your eyes wide and shining with unshed tears. you tentatively step towards the log you left to the side of the clearing before gripping it and carrying it to the pit. you let it go, making sure to use as little force as possible. 

you gasp as the blanket of foliage gives way, crackling and rustling as it collapses in on itself until it's all lying at the bottom of the pit intertwined with the spikes you'd sharpened. you fall backwards, covering your mouth with a shaky hand. 

what had you done? you.... could've killed lottie. had you intended to kill a prophet? a miracle worker?

you scramble to your feet and you're running before you even realize it, your boots thudding against the soft ground of the forest. you sink to your knees at the base of a tree and press your hand to the bark, feeling the cold, rough texture beneath your fingertips. they run over the grooves of a carefully-carved shape. a circle, a triangle, a hook. you look up, breath shaking, and feel for your sheath on your hip. the blade of your knife scrapes against the leather as you slide it out.

“please,” you whisper, eyes closing as you feel the sharp sting of the cold blade cutting into your palm. "forgive me."

your blood drips out as you close your palm into a fist, holding it up to tree like an offering, and in that moment you know you believe.

[leoisstillalive]

I honestly think that the actual two ways rosquez could reconcile is Marc not winning another wc (so staying with less then rossi) and then after retiring them reconciling (similar to casey and rossi) because there will be a clear "winner" and rossi won’t be threatened.

Or, marc gets the 10th (and maybe even more wins then rossi, but the 10th is more important i think), so rossi is kind of forced to reconcile with him because he probably will seems like a kind of sore loser if he doesn’t

But thats just a theory, a motogp theory

i'd like to be optimistic and say that valentino could swallow his pride and reconcile with marc if he makes it to 10 championships, but i personally think it would just make it all so much worse. i don't see valentino as the sort of man to care about people calling him a sore loser, particularly when the people doing so would be people that don't like him anyway. he's created his grand family of people who agree with every word he says, respect his legend and see him solely as such, and listens little to the jeers of outsiders. an echo chamber for a throne room!

i do agree that marc never winning another championship would open up a path to reconciliation, though. because, fuck, i think it would be greatly satisfying for valentino and, unfortunately, perfect for the general, "ironic tragedy" narrative.

after all, rosquez are a relationship that rely on some sort of power dynamic. they thrive on the toxicity of having one partner infinitely more influential or loved while the other suffers the burden of having to capture and hold their favour. if marc never won again, he would be seen as creeping tail between his legs back to vale, the merciful master. there's an element of fear to it, but we know these guys love all that (especially marc): their job is literally to try and not die as fast as possible for forty minutes a day.

so yeah i think it is make or break. of course, there's the off chance valentino will do some shrooms and have a crazy, introspective trip wherein he achieves self-actualisation and allows peace back into his heart. but i doubt it.

[katiesautisms]

The original Plants vs. Zombies is so fucking funny to me, cus like if you know how to actually play the game, even just a little bit, you can go on an ultimate fucking power trip.

Like there is no fucking reason zombie hordes are so small but we have plants so fucking powerful. There are SO many plants that can wipe out several waves easily. Winter melon, doom shroom, cob cannon. Pvz is an unbalanced mess and I genuinely wouldn't have it either way.

Pvz 2 is kind of similar, although if youve played that game youd find it can be alot harder than the original pvz 1, but even THEN you can pretty easily annihilate everything on screen if you know what you're doing! (even if you never use that BULLSHIT level system [hhh, another rant for another day])

Winter melon is still overpowered, even MORE powerful in pvz 2 actually since theyre alot easier to get down on the lawn. But we ALSO have magnifying grass, cold snapdragon if you know how to commit piracy, primal peashooter; hell in some older versions, you could kill EVERYTHING OTHER THAN ZOMBOSS HIMSELF INSTANTLY with spring bean, plant food, blover, and some PRECISE timing

in conclusion, offical pvz games are so un fucking balanced its genuinely some of the most fun I could ever have in a game, maybe one day i'll talk about the more interestingly designed plants and zombies in the tower defense games or, hell, the shooter games too!

[lighthouseas]

Hi I saw you have written a MistyNat fic. I'd love to read it but it says I have to be verified user on AO3, is there any way to be able to read it on Tumblr as the preview of it looked great!

Thanks! :)

hello anon, since you asked so nicely i have copy and pasted it here for you (and others) to read :) though for future reference the reason my ao3 is verified users only is because of ai scraping. if you want to read my fics there, creating an account is completely free!

oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth

Misty feels Shauna’s looming presence the most, oddly enough. She isn’t even playing with them—she’s just standing ominously by one of their wood huts, watching as they giggle by a hastily made fire. She’s been like this for weeks—more of a shadow than anything else. Misty had invited her to come play about fifteen minutes ago, but Shauna had just told her to fuck off. Unsurprising, but nevertheless ungrateful. This could mean that Misty will get more attention, though, so it might not be all bad.

Lottie is eyeing everyone in the circle, a cup of mushroom tea in her hands. Travis is side eyeing it, cautious of its influence—though Misty doesn’t really know why. Mushrooms are fun. She thinks fondly back on the time where everyone had accidentally gotten dosed on them. She’d really like to do it again. She doesn’t say that, though, lest she get kicked out of the circle for supposedly being “crazy”.

“Okay, here’s how this works,” Van says, placing a dusty beer bottle with a broken tip that they had managed to save from the burning cabin in the middle of the circle. She smirks evilly, but it’s all playful. Misty can’t help but notice that Van skips making eye contact with her, even if she probably looks the most excited to play out of everyone there. “We spin it twice. The two people it lands on can either choose to go into that hut,” Van points to the wood hut farthest away from them, and, thankfully, the one farthest away from where Shauna stands— “for…roughly seven minutes, or, if they’re cowards and don’t want to run the risk of getting too close with one another—” the group cackles at that. Misty notices Nat shifting on the ground, side eyeing Travis. She’s biting her lip. She doesn’t want to get paired with him, and for a moment, Misty feels a little bit bad. “...they can both take a sip of this wonderful shroom tea and start tripping balls. So, it’s a win win either way.”

The group laughs, loud and all consuming. Misty laughs along with them, notably louder than the others. Nat gives her a look from across the circle. It’s almost like she can tell that Misty isn’t really being genuine; that she’s only doing this to fit in. Which is—okay, it’s partly true, she supposes, but Misty also likes party games. She’s doing this for fun. Maybe she’ll get to kiss Travis. The thought makes her stomach twist, but it would still be fun. Probably.

Van spins the bottle, and Misty watches it go, lightly flicking dirt in all directions as it twirls along the ground. It’s oddly mesmerizing, and Misty can’t look away. She glimpses Nat in the reflection of the glass bottle—she’s staring too, equally intently.

She focuses on Nat’s brown eyes, just for a second.

The bottle stops—it’s pointing at Mari, because of course it is. The whole circle makes an ooooh sound, spare for Misty. It goes without saying that if it lands on Misty the second spin, Mari’s going to make her drink instead of brave the seven minutes with her. Most people will, actually, but Misty tries not to dwell on that thought too much.

The bottle spins again, eventually landing on Taissa.

Mari snickers. “I don’t think she’d want to go in with me, considering…” her eyes dart between Van and Tai. They both laugh, nudging one another affectionately.

“Alright then. Let’s drink, yeah?” Tai replies, unbothered.

The whole circle lets out a chorus of supportive yeahhhs in response. Lottie hands the cup to Mari, who takes a generous sip, and then to Tai, who grins and drinks. Van is giggling beside her, murmuring a soft “thanks” in Tai’s ear. For a moment, Misty feels something warm come over her.

It goes away soon enough as the bottle begins to spin again, marking the second round. It lands on Travis. He flinches, fingernails digging into the ground. Lottie throws a glance his way, gripping the mug of mushroom tea like she owns it. Misty can already feel the mood around the circle beginning to get heady—Tai is giggling at a stray leaf drifting across the forest floor and Mari is lying on her back, staring up at the evening sky. Misty shifts in her seat on the ground, trying not to let it throw her off.

The bottle spins again, landing on her.

It isn’t like before, with Mari. The circle goes silent for a moment, and Travis’s eyes go wide, almost like he’s…scared? Misty can’t imagine why. 

“So, uh, Travis—” Misty starts, smile a little too eager and posture a little too straight, even if she knows where this is going.

“Drink,” he interrupts, motioning for Lottie to hand him the cup. Misty deflates, not because she had wanted to make out with Travis—as a matter of fact, the idea of that sounds absolutely revolting to her—but because of the snickers that she notices immediately start travelling around the circle in response. It’s embarrassing. Nat shifts in her seat awkwardly, briefly making eye contact with Misty before focusing her gaze on the ground.

Maybe she feels bad. 

Travis takes a sip, and then Misty does too, though she’s infinitely more hesitant about it. She doesn’t want to get too high—not tonight, at least. If someone gets themselves hurt, they’ll need her help—someone will do something stupid and then Misty will have to swoop in  like she always does. Good. That’s good. A large part of her wants that, craves the validation. She closes her eyes, trying to unhear the snickers and whispers vibrating throughout the circle. 

She assures herself that it will stop soon.

The bottle spins again, and, finally, the two elect to be alone for seven minutes—Lottie and Akilah. The group waits, giggling and speculating on what they could be doing. When they come back, Akilah looks vaguely like she’s just been exorcised, and Lottie is smiling slightly. She had probably lectured Akilah for all seven minutes on how to become “one with the wilderness”. Whatever. They both look pleased, so no one questions it.

Tai and Van. Lucky. They make out for all seven minutes, undoubtedly. When they get back Misty can see a hickey forming on Van’s neck and can hear the laughter, though it sounds distant, like an echo in a dark cave. Everything looks wobbly—she’s starting to feel the shrooms.

Nat and Travis. Drink. Travis takes a modest sip. Nat does not. The interaction should feel more uncomfortable because of their history, but Misty feels too floaty to care.

Nat looks pretty by the firelight. Misty thinks that the brown hair suits her. She should tell Nat to grow out her roots more.

She won’t, though. She won’t.

Gen and Travis. Finally, Travis decides to go into the hut. Nat is lying flat on her back, chest rising and falling in distinctly rapid succession. She has no reason to be worried, really—Misty doubts that Travis is going to do anything, considering how high he already is. And Gen is nice. She wouldn’t take advantage of him.

They come out after what is probably more like five minutes, not seven. Travis stumbles, looking up at the trees. Gen walks behind him, a mildly frightened expression painting her features.

“You guys hear that?” Travis murmurs. Misty might hear it—the wind? It blows softly through the tree branches, singsongy in her ears. Like a lullaby. “The trees are talking.” Oh. She doesn’t hear it like that.

“He was like this the whole time,” Gen says tiredly. “Lottie, can you—”

“Travis, it’s okay. Come sit.” Lottie pats the empty spot next to her.

“No, the trees, I—”

“ Travis, ” Lottie insists, “Everything is okay. It wants you to hear it. Especially right now.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Travis blinks, almost in slow motion, before going to sit next to Lottie. Normally, Nat would be butting in to defend him, but she isn’t. She’s still lying on her back, and now her hand is up in the air, where she can turn it over and thoroughly investigate each knuckle. Misty watches her, unable to focus on anything else. 

She doesn’t hear the trees. She wonders if Nat can, but just isn’t telling anyone.

“Misty,” Van snaps, and Misty startles out of her trance. “It landed on you and Nat. You in there?”

“What—” Misty stares at the bottle. It’s currently pointing towards Nat, who’s sitting up. When did she sit up? “Oh.”

The group laughs. Someone says “oh my god, she’s so high” in a mocking tone, though Misty isn’t quite sure who. Nat is looking at her, lips pursed and fingers digging into the earth below her. Her fingernails are starting to get dirty from all of the scratching.

“So, what’ll it be, Quigley?” Van asks, though it sounds more like she’s making fun of Misty. 

“I, um—” Misty stammers, the mushrooms starting to impede her brain functions. “Well, I guess, I mean, Nat, you like drugs, yeah? So—”

“The fuck?” Nat shouts, louder than she probably should. Her eyes are completely bugged out, and she’s angry, shit. 

Van looks between the two of them. “So…drink?”

“If that’s what Nat wants,” Misty says, softer this time.

“How do you know what I want?” 

Misty can feel her face heating up, the smell of smoke and sweaty bodies overwhelming her. “I mean, I just assumed—”

“Fuck it,” Nat interrupts, standing up and wobbling on her feet. She uses a nearby tree for balance. “You want the seven minutes, and it’s your call, right? So we’ll do the seven minutes.”

“Oh—oh, okay,” Misty nods, maybe a bit too eagerly, and stands up. The ground shakes under her. She gives the group a two thumbs up, though she isn’t really sure why. “Uh. Bye guys.”

“Uh—okay. Yeah. Great. Have fun,” Van laughs, giving Taissa a look that screams what the fuck.

Nat walks fast. She’s way ahead of Misty, storming by Shauna, who’s sitting under a tree and writing in her diary. Shauna throws a glance at them, but Misty can’t decipher its meaning. She probably shouldn’t try.

Nat isn’t like the others. Misty knows this by now. She hunts the animals, sure, but she also feels bad about things, and usually leaves the butchering to Shauna. She’s a loner and a would-be high school dropout, but she’s not mean. She feels things, and Misty can tell she feels more than the other girls; she just doesn’t like to admit it. Misty recognizes this, but can’t really understand why she is the way she is—it’s sweet, but weird. Really weird, considering their circumstances.

Nat doesn’t snicker at her as much as the others do, though. So that’s nice.

Nat climbs into the hut first, disappearing into its darkness. Everything is still looking wobbly, and suddenly the hut looks much bigger than Misty could have ever imagined—towering over the trees, ominous-like, ready to consume her at any moment. When do the seven minutes start, again? Misty’s heart speeds up just a tad, her palms beginning to sweat.

“You coming or what?” Nat calls, then giggles. “Woah. My voice sounds different in here. Misty, the hut makes your voice sound funny. Come in, come in.” She wouldn’t be saying this normally. She’s high as fuck.

Misty chuckles, trying to quiet it with a hand over her mouth. She climbs in, and Nat is sitting there, eyes wide and inviting. Her pupils are super dilated, though Misty can’t imagine that hers are any better.

“Seven minutes, starting now!” Misty jokes as she sits down. Nat does not laugh. Misty swallows. “What do you want to do?” It’s all she can think to say, her mouth having gone bone dry.

It’s the drugs, she assures herself.

Nat shrugs. “I dunno.”

“Well, we could just talk.”

Nat huffs indignantly. “...About?”

“Um…” Misty shifts in place, considering the question. “Boys?” That’s what people usually talk about during these things. It seems appropriate to suggest.

Nat picks at a stick on the wall of the hut, trying desperately to get it free. “Fuck no.”

“Oh, well, I just thought—”

“Misty, I said no.”

“Okay. Sitting in silence, then.”

“No, I mean—” she finally gets the stick loose, grinning at her small victory. “We can talk, just not about that.”

“I mean, the other option is making out.” Misty’s mouth moves faster than her brain, which is moving shockingly slow. Shit. 

“Ew, Misty, no!” Nat makes a face, but it’s impeded by the drugs pulsing through her system. It’s more of a slow blink in surprise. “No.”

“You say no a lot, Nat,” Misty chastises.

“Yeah, well, I think I have good reason to.”

“No, no, you’re the leader. I get it. You have to turn stuff down.”

“You really don’t get it,” Nat snaps, and Misty wilts. “You don’t get it.”

“Why?”

“Because you just—” Nat waves a hand at her, trying to indicate something that Misty really, really can’t decipher. “You’re you.”

“...Yeah.”

“You’re Misty-Fucking-Quigley. You don’t give a shit about the people here. You don’t—you don’t care.”

Misty wants to shout at her, but can’t. Her voice won’t go to that volume, not now. “That isn’t true. I help you guys. I nurse you back to health. I give—I give the most shits out of anyone.” She’s really struggling to form coherent sentences—she hopes Nat doesn’t dislike her for it. She should know by now that Misty isn’t always like this.

“Yeah, you do all that, but you’re also fucking crazy.”

“I’m not—” Well. She is. But that’s besides the point.

“I’m not saying you’re all bad. But you could never understand. Because you could never be a good leader.”

“I beg your pardon!” Nat is wrong. She’s so fucking wrong that it makes Misty’s blood boil.

At this, Nat snorts, then breaks into a chuckle, flopping against the wall of the shelter. She’s laughing at Misty, like, really fucking laughing at her, but it doesn’t seem like she’s trying to making fun of Misty. She just looks high, her cheeks flushed red and hair mussed from getting caught on the hut’s walls. She tucks a tress behind her ear, shaking her head.

“You’re weird as hell.” She accompanies the sentiment with an exaggerated wave of her hand, as if controlling her limbs has become physically impossible.

Misty doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t deny it. She’s too focused on the way Nat’s hands play with the twig she had pulled from the wall earlier, fingers bending and knuckles flexing. Dirty fingernails scraping incessantly, the soft sound accompanying their conversation.

“...Sometimes I like that about you,” Nat finishes, quiet.

Misty’s head snaps up, face flushed a deep red. Nat is giving her an incredibly obvious once-over. Without thinking, Misty moves closer, the rush of wind in the trees making her feel lightheaded. Every sound is amplified, including that of Nat’s breathing. She can feel her drugged up blood pulsing through her veins, delivering a blush to her cheeks and sweat to her palms and a hot, floaty feeling all over. She’s always admired Nat, and now, in the slight light of the moon creeping through the hut’s doorway, she looks like some sort of goddess.

In a way, she is. She’s their leader. Misty had gotten them stuck here, and now Nat is going to guide them through the Wilderness, not yet bending it to her will, but bowing to it, accepting its influence. And Misty knows, without a doubt, that she will be trailing behind her every step of the way. Nat will never know that Misty is the reason she’s found her purpose. That, in a roundabout sort of way, Misty is the reason Nat is sitting before her, high out of her mind, and looking goddess-like.

It’s okay. She doesn’t need to know. She just needs to know how much Misty wants this, even if it’s mostly the mushrooms that are giving her the capacity to admit it to herself.

“You like that about me,” Misty repeats, and she’s so close, she’s so fucking close, and Nat isn’t moving away. 

“I think,” Nat whispers, breath hot, “You’re crazy.” She swallows, throat raspy and dry. “But so are we. You just flaunt it.”

She’s not wrong. It stings a little, though.

Misty has to ask—“Why did you agree to seven minutes in heaven? Why didn’t you choose to drink?” 

“Honestly?” Nat giggles. “I need to lay off the drugs.”

“That’s all?”

Nat’s eyes dart downwards for a brief moment, and Misty’s heart skips. She can’t imagine what this would be like without the hallucinogens currently pulsing throughout both of their bodies. She moves closer, unthinking.

“Natalie—”

And then it happens, and Nat is surging forward, grabbing Misty’s blushing cheeks as she kisses her. Misty’s glasses are knocked askew, and she doesn’t even have time to enjoy it before Nat is pulling away. She looks alarmed.

“Shit, I don’t know—” Nat runs a shaking hand through her hair. “I don’t know why I did that, ‘m sorry—”

“Shut up,” Misty murmurs, a bit too aggressively. She’s the one to lean forward this time, capturing Nat’s lips in a kiss, and Nat huffs into her mouth as if she’s always wanted this too. Misty knows that she hasn’t—knows that deep down—but wouldn’t mind pretending for a while.

Nat pulls away for air. “You’ve never kissed anyone?”

Misty swallows, embarrassed. “No.”

“I can tell.”

Misty thinks it might stop there, that they’ll just go back to the group and try to forget about this tomorrow, but Nat pulls her back in, insistent. Misty doesn’t really know when it happened, but Nat’s tongue has made its way into her mouth, and her hand is in Misty’s mussed-up, endlessly knotted curly hair. Everything is hot and stuffy and maybe this is just some fucking hallucination. Who the fuck knows.

It’s seven minutes in heaven. This is what people do, right? Misty’s just doing what everyone does. And she likes that—but she likes kissing Nat more.

How long has it been? Three minutes? Fifteen? Where are they? Who are they? 

Misty pulls away this time, acutely aware of the fact that she can barely breathe. Nat follows her, leaning forward to beg for more. “Sorry,” Misty pants. “Air.” She points to her mouth, as if it’s any helpful indicator.

“Yeah,” Nat replies.

“You know, you’re—” Misty pauses, trying to remember the word. The moon seems to shine brighter against Nat’s features. “You’re really pretty. I’m sure you’ve heard that before, but I just wanted you to know that I think you are.”

“Misty fucking Quigley,” Nat murmurs. “Misty fucking Quigley.” She keeps repeating it, like a whispered mantra. She pauses, looking Misty up and down. “I know what people say about you. But for the record, I think you’re pretty too.”

“Yeah? ‘S not just the mushrooms talking?”

“Oh, it’s definitely the mushrooms talking,” Nat says, breaking out into a fit of giggles again. She leans forward, placing a hand on Misty’s shoulder to steady herself; Misty tries her best to pretend that that the touch alone doesn’t make her want to pounce on Natalie.

“It’s okay…me too.”

“You too?” And then Misty laughs with her, and they’re all close again, breath hot in each others’ mouths. Misty hasn’t felt this way in so long. Not since Crystal. 

They both lean forward this time, and the kiss is sweeter. Like people in a real relationship might kiss, like how Misty sees Van and Taissa kiss all of the time. And Nat—she draws it out, grinning madly against Misty’s lips. It has definitely been over seven minutes. People are bound to be wondering where they are.

Misty revels in the moment as it is, though. Nat does the same. She can tell that Nat doesn’t care about the time. Maybe, if they’re careful, they can just stay here forever. Nothing is impossible. Not right now. Not out here.

Footsteps sound outside.

“Natalie!” Fuck. “Misty! It’s been forever since you went in there, what the hell are you two doing?” It’s Shauna. Of all people. She isn’t even playing.

They jump apart right as Shauna peeks into the hut. She’s definitely seen them, if only for a split second, based on the expression that flashes across her face. She doesn’t say anything for a moment. Nat pales, looking like she’s just seen a ghost. 

“Oh—uh. Okay. Well. I’m gonna…go,” Shauna murmurs, walking away and muttering something indecipherable to herself.

“She won’t tell anyone,” Misty whispers, nodding seriously. “I’ll make sure she doesn’t.”

Nat’s eyes blow wide. “Please don’t poison her.”

“I wasn’t going to!” Misty wouldn’t dare. Shauna would probably kill her before she’d even managed to get the poison in her drink, anyway.

“Hey, guys?” Tai pokes her head into the hut, looking between them questioningly. “Time’s been up for a while.”

“Sorry. We got sidetracked,” Nat says effortlessly. The color has returned to her face, thank goodness. “Misty was telling me a story.”

“I was?” Misty has no recollections of doing this, but she’s high. Of course her memory is going to be unreliable.

Nat shoots her a look. “Yes, you were. Remember, the one about Coach Ben?”

“Oh,” Misty nods. “Yeah,” She’s not too bad at lying. “Yeah, I was.”

Tai looks between the two of them. She likes girls, she probably senses something—but, thankfully, she doesn’t say it, just shrugs and tells them to hurry up so that they can continue the game. Misty climbs out first, slow and wobbly. The wind in the trees is screaming louder, now, whispering indiscernible things to her. Nat follows her out, stumbling and giggling. Misty wonders if she will remember this tomorrow, if she’ll just ignore Misty and try to pretend it never happened.

They were high. That was all. That should be all—end of story.

Nat’s hair, now mussed from Misty’s prior grip on it, flutters slightly in the whispered wind. The dyed parts are barely noticeable under the cover of darkness. Misty’s mouth moves before she can stop it.

“I like your brown hair.”

“Huh?” Nat isn’t really all there; she smiles lopsidedly as Misty turns to face her.

“I said, I like your brown hair. It suits you.”

“Oh,” Nat runs a hand through her hair, smiling. “Thanks.”

“Sorry, I just thought I’d say that. It’s cute.”

“No, no. It’s fine. Good to know that it doesn’t look shitty.”

They’re nearing the group now, almost within earshot. Van is about to spin the bottle again; they’ll probably only do a few more rounds before finally deciding to call it a night.

“I don’t think you could ever look shitty,” Misty says hurriedly. “I meant what I said. About you being pretty.”

“Ah,” Nat giggles again. “So it wasn’t the shrooms.”

“No, they just gave me confidence to say it.” Misty wishes that her mouth would stop speaking for her, sometimes.

“Okay,” Nat nods, “well, I guess I could say the same for you, too.”

“I—” 

“Don’t think too hard about it, okay?” Nat says, patting her shoulder. “Please,” she adds.

Misty is definitely thinking too hard about it, though. Her mind lingers on it—Nat’s breath against her skin, her lips, her laugh, her staring at Misty in that particular way—

“Okay. Yeah. I won’t. This is just, like, fun sleepover things! Right?” 

And Nat—she laughs at that, but she’s got this smile that says she thinks what Misty said is endearing, not weird. Misty grins, too wide and showing too many teeth, and Nat smiles that perfect smile that she’s had since before the crash.

“Right.”

That isn’t all it is. Misty knows this, and her gut is insisting that she keep Nat close, assuring her that maybe, just maybe, it will work out this time. Nat isn’t like the others, she repeats to herself—and it doesn’t sound like a lie.

She knows it to be true.

[bitchesuntitled]

Walk in the Park

Little Dieter drabble for the @dieterbravobrainrotclub ❤️ Thank you @sweetenerobert & @jay-zzle for giving this a look over 🥰

Pairing: Dieter & GN!Reader

Warning: Cussing

Masterlist||AO3 Link

Divider by @saradika-graphics

“Fuck!”

You startle, shooting up from the bench you decided to rest at, as a man stumbles out of the bushes.

“Are you real?!” He asks panicked, scrubbing his hands along the sides of his face, twigs and leaves scattered throughout his dark messy curls, eyes hidden behind alien eye-shaped sunglasses you’ve seen at a local party store.

Great, a deranged stranger. He looks familiar but you can’t quite place him, gripping the mace on your keychain tighter. Wary of his presence.

“I just—“ he says, taking a deep breath and leaning over. Palms against his thighs as he exhales slowly, “I’m all mixed up out here. A friend of mine suggested doing shrooms and taking a walk, to get to know nature, all that bullshit. Horrible idea. Ever seen a frog up close and personal? Scary, unpredictable fuckers. Lead me astray hours ago.”

You couldn’t help but feel sympathetic for the man, having had your share of similar shrooms trips.

“Feeling okay?” You ask, deciding to take the kind route, and sitting back down. The man is dressed in soft pj pants, a threadbare shirt, crocs, and a bathrobe. Interesting choice for a trip to the park but you’ve seen worse.

“I think I’m finally coming down,” The man shrugs, “My name’s Dieter by the way,” he adds, extending his hand for you to shake.

“Nice to meet you, Dieter,” you say, grabbing his clammy hand, giving a small shake, and sharing your name.

“Do you mind if I sit?” Dieter asks, pointing at the spot next to you.

“Go right on ahead,” you nod towards the bench.

You begin making small talk, sharing bits and pieces about each other’s lives. You learn he’s an actor, which is why he looked so familiar. Award-winning actor Dieter Bravo, the trainwreck that he is. The bathrobe should have been your tip, can’t even begin to count the number of times you’d seen that featured on all the covers of gossip magazines.

“Okay, now let’s get to the hard-hitting questions,” Dieter says, clapping his hands together, the alien glasses sliding down his aquiline nose, “Do you believe in love at first sight?”

“Negative.”

“What about soulmates?”

“Not sure yet,” you laugh, shrugging, “Never found anyone worth my time.”

“That so?” Dieter asks, eyebrows peaking above the frame of his unique sunglasses.

“What is with those ridiculous sunglasses?” you ask, unable to contain a laugh, “I cannot take you seriously. You’re supposed to be some award-winning actor, yet you’re literally wearing pajamas and costume store sunglasses shaped like alien-eyes.”

“Inspiration, my dear,” Dieter smirks, “Inspiration.”

“Inspiration?”

“Of course! It’s for my next role, I’m a scientist on the search for answers of another life form.”

“So what?” You laugh, “You take shrooms, slap on some alien glasses, take a stroll through the park, and think you’re going to find your character?”

“Next question,” Dieter says, ignoring you, “Do you believe in aliens?”

“Of course.”

“Last question,” Dieter giggles, “Wanna have sex with me?”

You sit back, biting your cheek, looking at him. The patchy scruff on his face, his nose, his hair still scattered with leaves, and the earring dangling off his earlobe.

“Take the glasses off.”

He huffs but removes them, letting you get a good look at his face without anything obstructing your view. You look at those dark orbs, pupils still a little dilated, shaking your head.

“Maybe next time” you smirk, getting up and walking away.

[star-girl69]

Ultraviolence

Natalie Scatorccio x Fem!Reader

—-

a/n: exams are crazy these next few days so expect delays in chapters 💔 but i hope you all enjoy!!

warnings: murder, death, blood, knives, mentions of drugs (shrooms), kissing, mentions of sex, swearing, tell me if i missed anything!!

Chapter Eighteen - Everything

Chapter Eighteen - Everything

—-

2021-

Shauna called you early in the morning when you had just gotten on the road, your Starbucks in your cup holder, and you had almost considered not answering it. The hunt was over, and you wanted to go home, and go back to your boring life as a Whole Foods cashier.

You wanted to go back to the normalcy you had worked so hard to make yourself accept- and this short little trip would have to be enough for the rest of your life.

Shauna had called, and she had sounded so scared, talking about her murdered lover, and at first- you really didn’t believe her. But, you turned around anyways, heading back towards the address she had sent you.

You met up with Taissa and Natalie in the parking lot, where in the elevator Taissa ended up asking for a sip of your coffee. You had shared much worse together, so what was one sip?

“Jesus Christ,” Tai spat. “Why the fuck is that so sugary?”

You put the lid of your coffee back on, shuffling around awkwardly. “I like it sweet.”

Tai shoots you a look saying she clearly doesn’t approve, and just Natalie laughs slightly, thinking about something.

The elevator dings to a stop, and Natalie walks out and bangs on the apartment door, rustic farmhouse style, and Shauna opens the door with a shush.

“Is this his apartment?” Taissa asks, and the three of you file in, looking around awkwardly. You step around the counter, expecting someone to walk around from around the kitchen, or the bathroom, still not quite believing he’s dead- but Taissa suddenly lets out a loud gasp. “Oh, my God, Shauna… you killed him?”

A man lays on the floor, blood dripping from his mouth, an open stab wound in his chest.

“You guys are, like, so fucking insane,” you mutter, not able to take your eyes away from the pooling blood.

“Who is he?” Nat asks, less shocked by this, for whatever the reason.

“I met him a few months ago. We got into a car accident and then we started… sleeping with each other.”

“For fucks sake, Shauna, this is your boyfriend?”

“You were seeing somebody around the time that all of us got blackmailed and didn’t think to mention it?” Nat asks, throwing her hands around in odd ways.

“I’m telling you now,” she sighs.

Nat gestures to the dead body. “When he’s dead!” she shouts. “When he can’t fucking mumble a word to us. What the fuck, Shauna?” She starts pacing.

“Jesus Christ, are you even sure he did it?” Tai asks.

“Well, um… he went out to get coffee for us this morning, and when he was gone,” she picks up the duffel bag with Callie’s handprints on it, “I found this in his closet.”

Natalie snatches it for her.

“He came back and he saw me with it, and, you know, he realized that I must know what he did, so, he attacked me.”

You look over at Shauna, but she doesn’t seem hurt.

“And, I, um, you know, I had no choice.”

“Where’s my money?” Natalie asks, throwing around the empty bag.

“Where’s your money, Natalie? I’m not sure. Maybe he booked a cruise with it,” she sighs.

Natalie slams the bag onto an armchair, and you roll your eyes.

“Uh, it’s not here, but the burner phone, the one with the texts from your guys, it’s…” she holds up the small black flip phone.

“How did he know anything about the symbol?” Tai sighs.

“Well, um,” Shauna starts, digging through the bag and clearing her throat, “He also had these.” She holds up a small leather bound notebook.

“Oh, Shauna,” you mutter. “You didn’t.”

“What the fuck is that?” Tai asks.

Shauna sighs heavily, looking away from everyone. “They’re my… journals… from the wilderness. I-I couldn’t get rid of them. I’ve been really careful, they’re in a safe in my closet, but… he must have broken into it sometime pretty soon after we started seeing each other.”

“Holy shit, Shauna. You let this guy in your house?”

“Can you try to be a little less judgemental? I already feel stupid enough as it is.”

“You really think this is the guy who killed Travis?” Nat asks, leaning over the body.

You want to say something, to smack her, make it get through her head that sometimes death just happens. And she, out of all people, should know that.

“I-I don’t know.”

Natalie leans forward and starts touching him, and you bite back a gag.

“Oh, my God, don’t start touching him-”

“Natalie, don’t do that!”

“Jesus Christ!” you shout. “What if he has like, fucking HIV or something, Natalie-”

Shauna shoots you a wide-eyed look.

“-or something else!”

“I can’t believe you killed him, Shauna!” she shouts after she’s done with her search. “Now we’re not gonna know anything!”

“Well, you were gonna shoot him at the warehouse,” Shauna retorts.

“Okay, which, recall, we told her not to do.” Tai says.

“I wouldn’t have fucking killed him, I would’ve just hit his knees-” Nat starts to explain.

“He was lying to me,” Shauna says. And you look over and there’s tears in her eyes. “He was going to hurt me. I thought that- that he loved me, I trusted him,” she cries.

“Shauna,” you mumble, giving her a small hug as she turns around and wipes away her tears.

“Well, I needed answers. So, fuck, Shauna!”

“So, now what?” Shauna says after a moment, and you let the hands around her fall.

“Well, we can’t just leave him here.”

“Well, we can’t exactly- Weekend at Bernie’s him out the door, either.”

“Getting rid of the body isn’t our only problem, Shauna. Your fucking DNA is all over this place. Your fucking texts are in his cloud. God, the police are not gonna have to dig deep to find you.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Shauna says after Tai’s outburst. “You’re a lawyer. What-what do we do?”

“I practiced land use, not murder clean-up.”

Natalie finishes walking around the apartment, whatever she was looking for still not found.

“Hey. You’re all silent over there, that’s unusual. You got any ideas?”

Natalie sighs like she doesn’t want to say it.

“Yeah. One.” She rolls her eyes.

—-

1996-

You wake up on the cold ground, feeling like you had just committed a murder. There’s something sticky running down your chest and throat, and you’re covered in dirt, and you can tell your makeup is smeared.

Natalie groans.

You don’t remember how you got here last night, besides for faintly stumbling through the woods, Natalie dropping the knife they had almost killed Travis with, practically boiling in anger. You remember before that more clearly, the trees bending, looking for her, finding her and then Jackie.

Natalie sits up next to you and stares at you with wide eyes, your lipstick smeared all over her face and neck, and when you feel your tangled hair and look at your ripped dress, it’s not hard to figure out what happened.

“My neck hurts,” is the first thing you say.

She laughs. “Well, sleeping on the ground will do that.”

She’s still angry, you can tell, but all of last night is so hazy.

“What-what happened?” you mumble, trying to fix your dress, dusting the dirt off of you.

“Misty poisoned us,” she mumbles, bringing her knees up to her chest as she stares off into the distance. You stop.

“What? I mean, I know now that I was hallucinating, but, I-”

“Yep. Shrooms,” she whispers.

You reach forward and place your hand over hers.

“Natalie… what happened last night?”

She stares at you for a long moment. “I don’t know.”

—-

The two of you walk through the vaguely familiar woods, and after a moment, her hand slips back into yours, and you start to head towards the cabin.

Natalie squeezes your hand. “What did she mean, last night? Do you know?”

“Know what?” you frown, looking up at the trees, trying to remember what happened last night- but parts of it are covered in a haze.

“Lottie? How we’ll all see it like you soon?”

When you look at her, she looks scared.

“Lottie was high off her ass last night. Don’t- don’t listen to her, Nat.”

She pulls you to a stop.

“What do you remember from last night?”

“I hallucinated trees moving. I… I remember wanting to find you. I-I wanted to apologize, Natalie.”

She doesn’t say anything for a moment. “You don’t have to.”

“No, I’m sorry,” you whisper. “It was stupid, and I-I don’t know what I was thinking. I care about you, Nat, and not your past.”

She smiles and looks at the ground before looking back up at you, her crown of sticks hanging out of her hair. She looks back up at you, and her eyes soften, and she places a tentative hand on your cheek.

“I would have nothing if I lost you,” she whispers. “You… you’re my best friend, Y/N. You’re everything.”

What happens if violence and peace aren’t different? What if they’re one in the same? What if it’s the sun and the moon, constantly chasing each other through the sky, never quite meeting. What happens if peace and violence are connected in a way that is beyond your understanding?

“We’ll be better this time,” she says, staring at your lips. You hum, staring at hers.

You lean forward and kiss her.

This is what happens.

—-

taglist:

@sweetdayme4427 @dreaming-for-an-escape @peachydoki @happysparklingshadows @zhivaxo @maraudeerrs @karsonromanoff

everything taglist:

@emilynissangtr

[cvntyvvitch]

Alcohol 4/10 nice feeling uninhibited, but mostly just makes me feel sick and get a headache.

Alprazolam 2/10 very chill but mostly just felt tired and slow

Amphetamine 9/10 I'm fast as fuck boiiii, feel great and can do so much shit. constant flow state.

Caffine 7/10 like baby amphetamine, can't get to nearly the same level but gives you like the demo version. it's got the spirit of the amph.

Cocaine 5/10 like amphetamine but just kinda, worse idk. maybe like a slower come on, but you come down faster. amph got me going allll dayyy.

Dextromethorphan(DXM) 11/10 best shit ever, as long as you get the pure stuff and don't mix with meds. just makes everything feel great, feel like you are floating all day.

Diazepam 4/10 like Alprazolam but maybe like slower release. still not that fun tho.

Diphenhydramine 3/10 idk, after I forced myself to stay awake, did see the hat man but wasn't like that scary. maybe if I did it at night but wasn't horrible like I've heard. much better options tho, not worth the trouble.

Lysergic acid diethylamide(LSD) 7/10 alright this can be really fun BUT you gotta make sure you are in the right situation. if you are gonna be tripping in even a slightly uncomfortable situation, it will just be a ton of stress and no fun.

Methamphetamine 4/10 just do amphetamine. same issue with coke, doesn't last long, doesn't feel as 'clean' and you have to keep taking it. none of those problems with amph.

methylenedioxymethamphetam(MDMA) 6/10 I don't think I got a large enough dose for it to be that great, felt very warm and fuzzy, prob would have been great fucking on but didn't have the opportunity.

Nicotine 1/10 it's just really not worth the addiction. like you get that rush at first but very quickly it isn't fun anymore and it's just something you have to do.

Nitrous oxide 7/10 aight so I was doing this shit with whippit crackers and a baloon before you could get huge cans of the stuff, I attribute that to why my brain isn't completely fried. it's a bad idea probably but very nice tingly numbing feeling through your whole body. only lasts a few seconds tho so meh.

Oxycodone 6/10 fuckin lit, feel great for hours. like being drunk without the mental impairment or hangover, just the warm body feeling, very nice. prob not worth an opiod addiction tho so had to dock a point or 2.

Psilocybin 10/10 like LSD but kinda more controlled and spiritual. it's a slower come on and you feel much more kinda connected to the universe. with LSD I feel like you kinda crash into it and trip for longer than you want to, but with shrooms I feel they are just right.

Tetrahydrocannabinol(THC) 8/10 like pretty good all things considered, but in my experience it is easy to depend on it in the same way you can nic. kinda just makes you ok with daydreaming, but does feel nice when your tolerance is low. pretty easy to control the high if you know what you are doing which is a plus.

[monocodoll]

hey i really love your vile ventures mod! i have a lot of suggestions for it. obviously you don't have to implement them because the mod's amazing as it is and you already have a lot planned for it, but i feel like they would add a lot to the gameplay.

for acid and shrooms it would be cool if there could be more moodlets describing how the trip is going. for example feeling one with nature, impending doom, ego death, thought loops, and more. it would also be cool if there were popups like from the deep conversations mod, where if a bad trip is starting you can try to stay calm which has a chance of stopping the bad trip or you can freak out which makes it worse (if you want your sim to suffer).

in general i have a lot of ideas for extra moodlets and side effects - constipation from painkillers/opioids/ketamine, derealization from weed/psychedelics, weight gain from lean, weight loss from cocaine, itchiness from painkillers/opioids, bruxism/grinding teeth from molly/adderall/meth, fucked up teeth and skin from meth, sexual dysfunction/negative moodlets after woohoo, comedowns/afterglows, nic sick, accidentally injecting an artery instead of a vein, and more

ketamine or over the counter deliriants or dissociatives would be really cool too. your sim could buy ket from a dealer or go to the grocery store for dxm/robo or benadryl. benadryl would probably be a guaranteed bad trip and your sim will get the disgusting surroundings moodlet from seeing bugs and spiders everywhere.

tripsitting other sims and influence their trip, if they're having a bad trip you can try to calm them down or you can even mess them up. you can also have someone accompany your sim while they're tripping too, and depending on relationship or traits that could either be good or bad.

psychosis would be fun (not), if your sim has a bad trip from psychedelics there could be a chance of getting a psychosis moodlet. they'd have to visit the doctor and be prescribed antipsychotics. antipsychs can't really be abused so instead of having them in your inventory there should just be a moodlet for "on antipsychotics", and after a while the psychosis moodlet will disappear. (or maybe you can go to a mental hospital rabbithole)

going cold turkey on benzos can kill you in real life. maybe having a xanax addiction moodlet can have a chance of giving your sim a seizure unless you taper it.

it would be nice if you could launder money without owning a business, maybe using cryptocurrency (possible new feature?), gambling/casinos, or buying from a business with dirty money and getting refunded with real money (this can increase heat level if you do it too much)

before opioid overdose fatal or non-fatal your sim will get a nodding off moodlet which drains their energy. during this time they can administer narcan/naloxone to reverse the overdose.

"sell drugs" interaction on the phone, where your sim can make a post telling others they're selling. for the next few hours you may get 1-5 calls from acquaintances/friends asking to buy, or they could ask if you could deliver it to another lot. using this interaction increases heat, but you can create a separate account which decreases heat gain.

if you're at a certain level of the drug dealing skill you will also get random phone calls from other sims asking to buy pickup/delivery without using the "sell drugs" interaction on the phone.

if another sim calls you first asking to buy drugs, you can seal the deal immediately. however you can't choose what to sell them, they will order and you have to decide whether or not their order is worth the hassle.

a dark web feature would be really cool. at a certain level of drug dealing you can access the dark web and buy all drugs, with the same stock everyday. each transaction will increase heat but heat gain will decrease if you buy a VPN and/or use cryptocurrency to anonymize the transaction. however there is a chance you might get scammed - you may not recieve your purchase or they might even steal your money.

i see you're planning on adding strip clubs in the future, it would also be fun if you also added prostitution. i'm pretty sure pimping and purchasing sex is illegal in real life but being a ho is perfectly fine - so in game being the pimp or purchasing sex will increase heat but being a ho has no consequences (legally at least... selling your body is very traumatizing, constant sex, becoming a sex object, shitty pimps)

more ways to persuade dealers and buyers. for example trading drugs for guns/vice versa, woohoo for drugs or guns, robbery, or blackmail.

robbery only works if you have a gun. if you succeed you will get lots of drugs from a dealer for free or lots of money without giving up product from buyers. obviously this isn't a flawless method. you might have a gun pulled out on you and you might be forced to give up your drugs and/or money, and heat will increase significantly. your relationship with the dealer/buyer will be damaged and you will be unable to buy from them or sell to them for a while.

Heyy Anon! Hope you are doing well. Sorry for the late response. I wanted to take time to respond to this as detailed as possible. Here are things I may implement into future updates from your list.

Dark Web

As I add more criminal methods to Vile Ventures I will establish a Dark Web mechanic where you can utilize your dirty money to purchase items. Lock picks, Social Security #'s, Fake ID's, etc

Drug Client Calls

It will most likely be a misc feature in a future update. But I will add a mechanic for cliens that have bought from you to give you a call to try to set up a deal with you. With them choosing the order.

Advertising Drug Dealing

Most likely will be a misc feature in a future update. But, I would eventually like to add an a mechanice where you can advertise your drug dealing online and then potentially get traffic that way.

Drug Robberies

Probably won't be implemented anytime soon. Maybe when I get to revamp the entire Arms Dealing part of the mod. But, I'll probably make a mechanic where you can steal from drug dealers. However, the consequence is that word will get around and you won't be able to buy from dealers permanently. Unless you use wiser methods. Like using Counterfiet Money to make your purchase. That way your reputation stays intact. Meanwhile if you pull out a gun several times to do a robbery, then eventually word will get around and no one will ever deal with you again.

Trading With Drug Dealers

Most likely will be implemented when I add more criminal elements to Vile Ventures. Although there is also Arms Dealing. And you could technically exchange guns for drugs. That mod I don't consider it complete. It was honestly a test run to see if I could even implement something like Basemental Drugs. I loved using the Arms Dealing mod as a test run, because there was no pressure of animations. Which was something I could not properly produce back then. But, I learned a lot ever since and I consider it absolute in comparison to Vile Ventures. I would eventually love to completely revamp the Arms Dealing and implement it into Vile Ventures. I may even add proper Shooting Animations for the guns.

[misty-caligula]

A short post about DRUGS

The Doomcoming as a reference to It Chooses is such a specific choice, I think, because it was never resolved. I feel like some folk think it was like a non-sequitor, a sign of things to come but otherwise disconnected from the events that followed. But here’s a thought I’ve been having:

Here’s how a weird trip could have occurred if they were on, like, a camping trip. They go out, have some drugs, it goes places they didn’t expect, they go a bit wild, they come down, they wake up the next morning, feeling embarrassed, maybe a bit of pain and anger, maybe apologise to each other, pack up and go home. The whole thing is a ... blip on the radar of their lives, and tomorrow they’re back in Walmart, gossiping about celebrities.

But that’s not the situation here. There is no solid ground here, there’s nowhere to return to, and the Doomcoming is a fundamentally destabilizing episode.

When they hit the shrooms they have this transcendental experience. The core cult lay around and connected to each other, and with The Wilderness. Travis, Jackie, Misty, Ben and Natalie are all absent, and Javi doesn’t get into it, but the rest of them spend a lot of time in this ... space. Lottie has her premonition that Something Is Coming and that they’ll be fed soon, and then ... well you saw it.

But the day AFTER, when they wake up sober, they do not forget the experience. Mushrooms do not wipe your memory, you don’t get blacked out like alcohol. If you tried you could recall with a lot of specificity what happened, and what you were thinking. And the connections that people make while tripping are often ... lasting. People wake up the next day and change their entire fucking lives around, it happens.

So they wake up, and they’re a bit embarrassed, a bit overwhelmed, but NOBODY apologises. Nobody says “Man that was ridiculous and dumb.” There’s a moment, a tiny sliver of a moment, when Ben tells them what’s up, and they turn on Misty that they might have all decided that it was just a huge silly waste of time but then... the bear turns up.

That timing, that specific series of events, just completely vindicates not only Lottie as divine, but also the entire night of the Doomcoming as being... legitimate. Like, the part of them that’s still attached to the outside world (the part that’s getting weaker every day) knows what drugs are, knows how they work... and they know, in theory, to distrust it. But simultaneously... We’re also primed to look at drugs as a spiritual tool. For many thousands of years people have been using drugs to get attached to the supernatural. And in the Doomcoming they felt the connection. They felt what Lottie feels. And then, completely stone cold sober, they saw the proof.

So, when It Chooses comes around, they don’t NEED the drugs. They KNOW what to do, they’ve had the dress rehearsal. It’s harder sober, but the memory of the connection is there, is personal, and once the adrenaline hits, it’s familiar, and it’s Real.

It makes me think of the bacchanal. The way that their hunger, their grief, the weird spiritual randomness of the moment, culminated in an event they’d never have planned, and the way that they approached it as a manic banquet. Like they barely realised what they were even doing once they broke the taboo. It makes me think how vast the gulf is between that and what happened to Pit Girl, how calm they are, how Aware they are. The bacchanal got them through it the first time, as the drugs got them through the Doomcoming. In S2E9 I’m expecting... something much colder, much more ... deliberate. Aware.

[ofwrxth]

+ SASHA / THE FREY

"Sash, this stall is cursed. I swear! There's a fucking raccoon every time I look over my shoulder." Jerry scratches his elbow and, with a wince, looks over his shoulder for a beat. Almost as quickly as he'd looked, he glances away, whispering loudly to her. "It's still there." He says, nodding in the direction of the trash panda. "Did I take something?" Jerry's hand hovers around his mouth. "I know I shouldn't have had that pie from old lady Forester. I bet she put shrooms in it. Do you think I'm tripping? Do you see it? I feel like I keep seeing it. Did I make that up?" His questions come in rapid succession as he shifts from side to side on his work station stool. Though he doesn't know why Sasha insists on bringing him with her to The Frey. It's not like he can contribute much.

Still, he doesn't mind keeping her company. At least he didn't usually. But the raccoon! If he understood the complexities of what he did and didn't see, Jerry would know that his sister's familiar was always keeping a keen eye on him. And sometimes he even remembered it was her familiar. Other times, like today, he'd swear left, right and center, that it was an omen. Or a sign he'd been cursed. Though, perhaps it's not even Bandit whose gaze he's keenly aware of, but rather Echo. Non corporeal and unseen by her witch whose eyes were blind to his own magic when Jerry is present. Echo shifts, nudging Bandit away so Jerry will relax, following suit as they both jump off the table they were perched on. "Or maybe," Jerry's been rambling about the old stall owner for a minute now, "she's hexed them. Otherwise why would I keep seeing the trash –" he looks over again, mouth opening and closing at the sight of...nothing. "Panda...." @gloriouswhispers

[slit-you-open]

Thinking about bringing home this cocksucker i know, you know, one of those little fucking teases who doesn't seem to realize anyone's looking when they walk around with their thighs and stomach on display. I want them bad, I do. They say they're not looking for anything right now. Long term relationship. I'm about ready to snap, I want their ass so bad.

So fuck it. I'm thinking about bringing them back to my place. Tell him I want them in the living room, that we're going to hang out and have a nice platonic night in smoking weed and watching those dumb fucking cartoons he likes. I won't actually partake, but I doubt he'll notice. Justify it if he asks with work in the morning, but he probably won't even ask. Then... hell, I'll make him dinner, I know he likes that. Slip a little something fun in there. Not a serious tranq, I'm not pathetic. I want him to struggle. Just a little something to make it harder to remember in the morning. Shrooms, maybe, or a little ket.

I'll get him in my room somehow, it won't be hard. Tell him I've got a gift, or something to show him. They're stupid and trusting. It'll work, it'll be easy. They'll eat out the palm of my fucking hand if I tell them to. Just won't offer up that tight little cunt of his. The one fucking thing to call off-limits...

It'd be a classic to bend him over the desk, but really, a bed this big with a frame this solid is begging to be used. I'll pin his chest to it after we walk through the door. Trip him, maybe, the drugs will make him clumsy. He'll freeze first, ask what I'm doing; that's good because he's always wearing these tight denim jeans and I know it'd be a fucking hell of a time trying to unbutton them if he was thrashing. I could cut them off him if I need, but I don't want to have to need.

He's not gonna be that stupid even when I got him drugged up, though, I'm not gonna plan for him to be. He'll put it together when he feels me ripping his pants and his boxers away from his cunt. He'll start to struggle here, but not too hard. He's my friend. He won't want to hurt me, not at first. That works for me. He'll probably try to push his chest up, or try to push at my hands. Maybe both. Not coordinated. I keep ropes attached to the bedframe for other things - laundry lines and keeping stuff in place - but that's an excuse; the real reason is that it's easier to tie an errant limb up when you've already got everything attached. I don't want to really hurt him but i want to secure him first; i can always retie him later. His right arm is always going to be closest to the side of the bedframe. It'll be no hard task to catch it and tie it down to the metal, pull the line taut and trap his dominant hand to the side of the bedframe.

He's high, so he'll start begging here, getting scared. The tears will start to run, the gasping. "What are you doing, I don't like it, stop, what's happening?" Like music to my goddamn ears. My mouth is watering just thinking about it. And he's not stupid, just high. He knows some of what I like. It won't take long before he's really fighting, pulling hard and twisting and trying to bite me where I'm holding his face into the mattress. If I'm not careful, if he gets his teeth in my arm he's going to do some real damage, god knows he bites like a dog.

At this point fucking... planning around it is stupid, I know what I want and I know I'll be out of my mind with the wanting. i'd say I had more plans here, I'd say I'd fix the tie or I'd pull off his binder. I'm putting my fingers up his cunt, we all know that. He's going to be squirming and pulling, his stupid skinny jeans around his knees stopping him from doing almost anything with his legs, and I'm going to watch his ass work and the muscles strain and the way his belly fills out as he gasps for breath and I know I won't be able to stop myself. I'll swipe through his folds, flick his little t-dick, and then god knows I'll push my fingers into his hot little fucking hole and listen to the way his voice changes when I reach deep inside him.

He's probably tight as hell. He's been on testosterone longer than I've even known him. Every so often I hear him talk about this dildo and that one he can't quite make work any more. According to him he used to be a real size queen. I've been wanting to get my fist inside him since we met. I'll be seeing if it'll even work.

I think this'll scare him, just a little. He'll go still for a moment, let me fix my grip on his upper body. Easiest place to hold would be his neck, but he'll have a much harder time prying my hand off his upper spine, but honestly now that I have him where I want him I don't need him pinned. He's got nowhere to go; i'm between him and the rest of the room and his hand is tied to the bed probably tighter than it should be. I can let him up, wrap my forearm over his throat, instead. Not a choke, just a hold; something hard as fuck to get out of one-handed. Hell, he might even like having me pressed up against his back. He seems like the type.

He'll probably start trying to bite me again after a little of this, me fitting as many fingers as I can into his little off-limits pussy and panting and probably ranting deranged nonsense into his ear, and I'll have to grab his jaw if I want to keep control of that. That'll let him get a grip on my arm and try to pull me off, but that's not going to help him much. He'll probably try to kick off his pants, but there's no way that works out for him, not uncoordinated and without any real room to work. I might let his upper body go entirely just for the sake of looping my loose rope through the crease of his thigh and tying that to the bedframe too, though, just to hold him even more firmly in place. He'll probably slap at me, and god knows that'll make me laugh if it does anything. I don't think he'll be ready for me to hit back. I think he'll forget that's an option. I think it'll take him by surprise when I punch him in the ribs, and I think it'll really surprise him when i don't let him even try to get in another blow, no matter how uncoordinated, how when he starts raising his free off hand I'll hit him again, low and hard. I don't think he even knows how to land a strike on someone behind him; he might elbow me but I'd ve surprised if he did it well. And all the while I'd still be pumping my fingers in his cunt, feeling him twitching and clenching around me as I stretch his walls wider and wider.

I don't think two fingers will be hard to fit. Three maybe, but doable. My fingers are slim, all things told. The pinky I can work in no matter how tight he is, basic trick of physiology. When I get that in, I can work him over my knuckles. Maybe he'll tear. Won't put me off, I've always liked a little blood. Besides, he'll walk it off. If he's walking tonight, that is.

He's high and he's been fighting me. The more pain he's in, the less energy he'll have for any of that. I don't want him totally out of fight, but I want to maneuver him a little, move him around without getting kicked in the head for my trouble. These first few minutes are going to be the hardest, before i can really tire him out.

I'll force my whole hand into his cunt, thumb pinning his little t-dick between the side of it and the ridge of my hand, and while i'm curling and uncurling my fingers I'll push him up further onto the bed, change the angle so he's up on his toes, hips up on the mattress for me. That'll give me a good angle to get at him, really work my way into his cunt. Press the knuckles of my fingers hard into his cervix and the back of my hand against his g-spot, feel his little dick harden into the pressure even as he begs and sobs against my bed or tries again to shove me away. It'll be cute. I'll tell him, if I feel like it. I'm sure I will. It's cute that he'd get off from me violating his trust and his body like this, it really is, like he's practically a toy. Put in the right inputs, shove something into his holes and hold him down until he gets used to it, and he might even like it. I imagine this'll make him start fighting again; maybe it'll startle him bad enough if I ram my fist into him from the inside he'll stop and maybe it'll make him try harder, and there's no real reason not to find out. I'll give it a try, listen to the way he'll groan.

And all too soon it won't be enough, I know it. His turgid little clit pinned in my hand, his entire body splayed out for me, still tied. I really should fix that. Soon, sure. I need my hands free and I need my cock buried in him first. I'll give it one last thrust, one final squeeze to his clit, and then pull myself out, holding his folds apart. He might try to get away again, so I should be quick with this, working the head of my dick into his gaping hole. With the heel of my hand at the top of his pubis mound i should be able to keep him in place, at least enough, to thrust my way inside before he can get anywhere else.

Alright. With both hands free it's time to fix the ropes. He's probably got some compression damage on the wrist, maybe burns there and in his inner thigh both. And i need his legs to open wider anyway. I undo that and he's probably going to try to scramble up onto the bed; i'll use my off hand to catch him around the throat. Maybe by the hair instead. Maybe i'll hit him again. It'll make him jump, make him clench, make it all the better for me. Maybe i'll tell him I want to untie his wrist. Maybe he'll hold a little stiller for me, maybe he'll bide his time and try to get away when I undo the rope entirely. He'll feel good no matter what he's doing. I'll just be enjoying myself.

Instead of loosing his legs from his stupid tight jeans, I'll step through them with one leg, trapping his hips against me. I can maneuver fine like this. All it means is that he'll have even harder a time trying to get away from me. Then I'm going to lean over and sink my teeth into the side of his ribs.

By this point I know he'll be tired. Sapped of energy, between the fighting and the drugs. I'll take my sweet time with it. Tie his wrist back up right, tie his thigh up tight and admire the way it presses into the curve of his lower ass. Grope the parts of him he never lets me get away with touching, unzip his little binder and play with his stupid little tits and dig my fingers into the muscle between his belly and the bone of his hip, grab at his ass hard enough to bruise. Maybe i'll hold his little t-cock gainst the shaft of my own, stroke back and forth and tell him it's basically frotting, make a crack about how his is smaller than mine or something. Anything to put a little life into him, make him squirm and moan and go back to struggling like a fish on a line. Maybe he'll finally get one of his legs out of the jeans and try to kick me so I have an excuse to beat him black and blue.

I'll cum in him, just for the hell of it. I know he's not on BC, but i'd be surprised if anything came of it. I could blame it on his girlfriend if it did. Don't think they would even think of me either way. Then while he's lying there, tired and practically out of his mind, i'll take his phone and his thumb, use his tied-up hand to open the finger lock. What's he going to do, stop me? I'll open up his Instagram, post a story, maybe snap a picture of his face from the front, me barely visible in the back, slap some text on. "made a really bad choice tonight but it felt so good, might have to fuck around on the dl more often" or something. Throw some doubt on the record. We all know what he likes, it's not like it'd be out of this world for him to have asked me for this. If he didn't have that fucking girlfriend, that is.

Then I'll take some real photos, nice ones. Spanl bank material. His leaking cunt, maybe a shot with my fingers back in there if I'm still feeling tempted. My hands on his hair, his ass, his back, some of the brighter bruises. The ropes, probably. God knows the cherry burns and black fabric will sit nicely against each other. Maybe if he's really flying high I'll tell him to smile, see if I can't get a couple real good shots of his tear-streaked face in there too. Maybe i can even convince him he asked for this in the morning.

Because he's still going to be here, of course. He's high, he's got to sleep that shit off here. He knew that from the minute he got here.

I'll bundle him off to the shower, make sure he's clean and seems taken care of. I'll bandage any cuts. Remind him what a great time I had, tell him I'm glad we're friends. We'll crash in the same bed, the same way we always have. I'm sure he'll notice the way I'm holding him is hard to get out from unnoticed. I'm sure it'll be the first time he ever does.

In the morning I'll say something stupid, something cheesy. Ask him how I played the role or something, let him think I thought that was what he wanted. Ask if next time I should get him off more or if that was enough, if I should be rougher. If I scrambled his brains right, he'll be second-guessing already. He'll get nervous, get weird. He'll go home, work himself into a panic, and try to hide it from his girlfriend. But i'm sure someone's already shown her my post to his account, at that point.

Maybe they'll break up. Maybe he'll even ask me to tap his ass a second time, if I play my cards right.

Mmm... Maybe I really will invite him over. Just gotta make sure I have everything set up...

[slashingdisneypasta]

Dale Acton x Fem!Ex!Reader || Oneshot

Plot: Dale's shocked to spot you, the one who got away, in a bar one night and its very clear- he's not over it.

Warnings: Cursing, sexual references, reverences to mob activity and first-time smoking. Also unedited.

Its not long before Wayne notices Dale's attention continuously flitting away from the group and over to the bar side, seeing a girl get such a gloomy puppy dog look out of his young associate. A mean chuckle flickers out of his mouth, shaking his head and taking a slow sip of his beer.

"What are you waiting for? I can give you some pointers... but I don't think you want 'em... "

Looking away from the girl again, back to the table that only has 25 percent of his attention tonight, Dale picks up his own beer; putting it to his lips. "The hell are you talking about old man??"

"The girl y'cant stop starin' at. D'you know her? Or doya just want her ass that bad?"

At this Dale's mouth clamps shut, setting the beer back down and looking away. Not to her, this time. Just away from Wayne's horrible jeering face. He's not up for it, tonight- not with you here.

Norman, quiet up until this point and faced the opposite direction to the bar, takes this moment to turn around and check out this girl. He might as well; its better to know exactly what's going on, with these two. Well, with men like them in general... but especially his two morons.

It doesn't take much to figure out which girl they're talking about- he knew her. Y/N. She was hanging around Dale - or, actually, he was pretty much hanging around her. Not that she seemed to mind at all, for a while, - some years back. Before Wayne got out of prison and joined up with them. A little after that Lucas Cain fuck up.

... letting out a huff of a chuckle, barely smiling but definitely amused, Norman turns back to the table; shaking his head. Wayne jumps on him. "What?? What? Who is it???"

"Thats Dale's girl who got away... " Norman lifts up his glass, filled with amber liquid that burns, smirking into the glass. "Isn't that right man?"

Shifting uncomfortably and frowning deeply, Dale refuses to respond. He doesn't like them talking about you- he definitely doesn't like Wayne knowing about you. Yeah, sure, he's come to like the guy - he's a fucking asshole but the guy knows how to have a good time, sometimes, - , but you cant trust a guy like that. Though, Dale supposes, you cant really trust any one of them. They're losers... you were right.

Wayne watches him carefully though, dark eyes taking every little movement in and slowly smirking. "... oh."

"Oh?" Dale fucking hates it when Wayne does shit like this. Thinks he knows what the hell he's thinking when he doesn't. "Fucking what, old man??"

"You got a little broken heart, huh?~ "

"Shut up."

"Uhuh, real broke. What'd she do? Find someone new and leave your ass?" The smirk gets even bigger, like the cheshire-fucken-cat outta that one fucked-up movie - god Dale hated that movie, since an old buddy of his made him watch it while tripping balls on bad shrooms. Worst trip of his goddamn life, and the stupid fucking cat gave him nightmares for weeks, - , and then their's knocking under the table from above Wayne's lap. His hand's lost under the surface. "I bet he had a much bigger dick, right? Whore's are fickle like that, huh?"

Dale cant take the heat. Not fucking tonight. Before the old bastard can say more, he shoves the table in anger and gets up to his feet- leaving him and fucking Norman, who's not doing shit right now, to go smoke out the back. Maybe when he comes back, you'll be gone and he'll be alright again.

Once outside, the cool air on his face and a lit cigarette between his lips, he has a moment to think. What Wayne said hit its mark, of-fucking-course.

But he was still wrong. You didn't leave him for another dude; You weren't- well, you were a whore,.. but you were his whore. Or at least tats what you said that one time... trying to cheer him up after a bad night with Norman and Lyle. I'll do whatever you want, you'd told him so gently, his face so gentle in your hands and perched in his lap were you were supposed to be. Just please baby; smile. Cheer up for me. I hate to see you all mopey.

The memory warms him up in the cold, the smoke filling his lungs and calming him down. For a second he can forget that you're in there, feeling like you're thousands of miles away from him anyway.

You were the fucking sweetest. You were actually perfect.

He fucked it up. It was him. He knows that; thats the worst part.

You were okay with him working with the Tyrus', as long as he didn't get you in any trouble. And that was fine, he had thought at the time. No problem. He didn't want you getting hurt, either.

... But Lyle heard about you. He wasn't sure how, though he has a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with Norman. And he wanted to meet you. You said no, you didn't wanna be apart of it, and Dale thought- cool, fine. I'll just go tell Lyle you're not into it and that'll be that. Right?

Blowing smoke out of slightly parted lips and glowering at the opposite wall, the alleyway Dale's hiding in cramped and full of fucken trash feeling even smaller all of a sudden thinking about this. Because, no, Lyle wasn't fucking 'okay' with that; saying some shit like if the girl wont join the family then well she couldn't reap the fucken benefits- or something like that. And... he told Dale he had to drop her.

And Dale did.

He doesn't fucking know w h y he did, but he did. Like Y/N meant nothing. And he can still see the hurt, confused look on her face when he picked a fight with her out of nowhere all those years ago and left that same night. He can still fucking see it.

Getting so worked up, Dale accidentally crushes the cigarette between his fingers; making him curse as he chucks it to the ground and searches for another one to light. The flame is just lighting up his face again, when the back door to the bar opens up again and he looks up to see you slip out.

He freezes.

~

As soon as your eyes fall on Dale out in the alleyway, the gentle, tipsy smile falls off your face completely. Your eyes widen. You freeze.

"... fuck." You knew you saw Norman in there.

Dale lowers his head and comes towards you, flicking his cigarette away from him with a familiarly fingerless glove-covered hand and pocketing his lighter quickly. "I'm getting out of here, don't worry- "

Before he can squeeze past you through the door, way-too-damn close to you after all this time, you put a hand to his chest and push him gently back. "Hey, hey, hey. How come you get to leave??"

"Uh- okay, yeah you're right." He has that cute almost-innocent look on his face, almost believable with those pretty brown eyes if it weren't for the stoner goatee, and your stomach does summersaults that you sternly ignore. "What, uh... whadayou wanna do then??"

"I... " What do you want right now?? You want to yell at Dale, thats for sure. You've spent the last couple years getting over him and what he did to you (trying to figure out why), which was hard as fuck and the job is still not done apparently. But also you want to just be anywhere but here, snug in your apartment wearing fuzzy slippers watching horror movies or f.r.i.e.n.d.s; you don't wanna deal with this at all. So... Your gaze lowers to his pocket, where you saw the lighter disappear, and bite your bottom lip. "... can I get a smoke?"

"... you smoke now?"

"Right now I do! Can I have one or not?" You snap, irritated at him acting like a bonehead right now. He hops to it really quickly then, fumbling in his pockets to get out another cigarette and handing you the lighter. "Thanks."

A tiny smile slips across his face, pleased to hear something so 'nice', from you. "Uh, no problem- " Ugh.

"Don't talk."

"Ok."

~

About 10 minutes, a coughing fit and a back pounding from Dale, and you're just sitting side-by-side on the steps now. Silently.

... except- "Look, Y/N, lemme explain what happened when we uh- when we broke up. Okay? So- "

Except Dale cant keep quiet for too long. "What happened to the silence?? I liked that."

"Yeah, but- "

He's working you up, a deep frown drawing across your lips. "I don't wanna hear it!" You snap again at him, feeling all the frustration and confusion coming tumbling terribly back like the goddamn Jabberwock's head in Alice in Wonderland. God, you hate that movie- "I made up plenty of explanations after you left, and you know what? None of them made me feel better. I mean!?-- What could possibly be an excuse for what you did, Dale?? We were happy! I mean, I thought we were. But then you picked the dumbest fight out of- out of n o w h e r e, and left! And I never saw you again! Who the fuck does that?? How do you excuse that?? I don't- "

Suddenly those half cotton-clad fingers cover up your cheeks and you're pulled into familiar lips. You sink into the kiss like the last time you did it was just yesterday; tilting your head deeply and kissing him back with as much pent-up need as he is kissing you with. You didn't know you wanted this- missed this- needed this, until now.

When he pulls back, still holding your face, a thumb brushing against our cheek bone, your lips feeling bruised, he looks absolutely earnest. Which is an odd look on him, if you know him; which you do. Dale's a dumbass, bad news, insincere loser. Or at least, thats what you told him he was that loud night he just up and left.

"I know. There's no real fucking excuse. I just- I just wanted you to know, I guess... I didn't wanna."

... what on earth does that mean?? "Y'didn't- "

Suddenly he stands up and you have to crane your neck to look at him. But then he steps up onto the top step and reaches for the door, and you're watching him leave (again), and you cant help it. you scramble up after him and catch him by the arm and draw him back to you.

For a moment you don't know what to say, lips parted and mouth dry. This is possibly the dumbest thing you have ever done, but you never were smart when it came to Dale Acton. "... um- "

"What?"

"I- I- I don't know."

"You don't..?" He's searching your face for a clue kind of desperately, but you're searching for the same thing on his. You're both hopeless.

"I just... don't want you to leave again just yet." You don't know yet if you could stomach that excuse he was going to give you, or if you could ever forgive him-- but you're a little tipsy, and he looks so good, and you've missed him. There's never been anyone else, not one, and... Your fingers and eyes feel down from his shoulder, coming to rest unsurely on his chest. "I just... "

Looking up at his face again, you lose it. Your lips collide once again and this time its not just a short, little kiss.

~~~

Inside the bar Norman and Wayne watched you slip out the back a few minutes after Dale did and fully expected one of them to come storming out a minute later... but then 10 minutes past.

Then another 10.

By the time the half hour mark hits, Norman's rolling his eyes and Wayne's smirking into his 4th beer. They know what that means.

[e-m-p-error]

fuck it *gives chazz illumorphene*

Trials in Tainted Space Transformative Items Magic Anons

Illumorpheme - Grants the user moth attributes. If user does not have wings or antennae, illumorpheme will cause them to manifest.

[ Chazz ]

He didn't even notice as he was slurping on the tube of creamy liquid that anything was changing about himself. He hummed a little, bouncing his head from side to side to the song stuck in it when he noticed something weird dangling in front of his face. Long, feathery antennae hung down, drooping more when he noticed them before standing up straight.

"Wha-- Huh?" On his back, large seafoam green wings fluttered in confusion, further fueling that feeling in him, "What?"

Did he stop eating it? No. Was he confused? Absolutely. But he'd drank an entire teapot of shroom tea twenty minutes ago and he was chalking it up to a bad trip.

Sluuurp slurp.

"...damn." Whatever he'd been eating had been so tasty... Maybe he could find another one.

...if he could see. Why was he suddenly struggling so much to see?